


it was called yellow.

by carrotstix



Series: starlight. [2]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alex Is An Actual Big Sister This Time, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, F/F, Kara's Gut Feelings, Quidditch, Useless Gays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2019-02-17 15:16:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 34,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13079646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carrotstix/pseuds/carrotstix
Summary: Lena cuts her off with a chuckle, soft and low. “Don’t worry, I’d never let him blow up our lab,” she tells Kara. “I mean, how our poor grades would suffer, I could never!”Lena places a hand over her chest, sighing dramatically, and Kara laughs, forgetting for a moment that they’re in the library. Across the table, Lena’s eyes are crinkling at the corners with her smile, and in that minute, Kara decides the best thing Winn has ever done was bring Lena to their table.or, Seven years at Hogwarts, four years on the Quidditch team, three romances, two dorky boys as best friends, and one Kara Danvers.(And a lifetime of loving Lena Luthor, in one way or another.)





	1. i came along

**Author's Note:**

> i really can’t believe i started this whole project. i mean, don’t get me wrong, i loved made of starlight, but it was such a process, especially because i wrote it all so quickly (think: one month). and instead of giving myself time to breathe, i’m out here with a sequel!!!! who am i????  
> anyway, enjoy?  
> [ in all seriousness, i’m here to write this because the response from made of starlight was amazing and overwhelming and endlessly encouraging so i’m back on it with a full-blown sequel, a la kara danvers. ]  
> [ also, it’s important to note that this will be shorter than made of starlight. mos had a goal of 5000 words per chapter, this fic has a goal of 4000. also, certain chapters of mos went 1000-3000 words over the goal, so… yeet ]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara's waited her whole life to get here. It feels kind of like her life is only now beginning.
> 
> or, we all witness me sign myself for seven more chapters of kara and lena being really gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome lads

Kara has waited years to go to Hogwarts.

At least half her life, that is. Ever since she’d been adopted by the Danvers, she’s been surrounded by reds and golds and blues and silvers, the house colors of Jeremiah and Eliza, respectively. Her biological family, her mother and father, had used magic, sure, but to them it was normal, regular, living in a wizard city where magic was just another part of life.

With the Danvers, though, magic always felt… a bit more fantastic, in a way. They lived on a muggle street, in a muggle town, where Alex and Kara spent the first couple years of their education in a muggle school. Outside of the home, magic was hush-hush, a well kept secret. Inside their home, it was often talked about, but rarely practiced, until Jeremiah would pull out his wand with a lopsided grin and do some fun little spell, setting off small fireworks in the dining room or causing the silverware to dance on the countertops.

(With his passing, the house got a lot quieter. Eating utensils stayed flat on the table, and there were no more blue and green sparks dancing on the ceiling.)

In a way, Kara’s enraptured by the idea of Hogwarts. An entire school, a whole castle, dedicated to the practicing and learning of magic. There, she could do all the spells she wanted, could learn all the spells she wanted. The first time her sister came home from school, away on Christmas holiday, she told her about staircases that moved on their own, portraits that acted as doors if you gave the right passwords. Alex told her about feasts that covered tables in the Great Hall, about the Sorting Hat and the train and everything else about the castle that Kara wanted to know.

The day her turn to leave for school rolls around, she’s ecstatic. She wakes Alex up by jumping on her older sister’s bed, goes through one last checklist to make sure she’s packed everything she needs, and drags them both downstairs for breakfast.

When Kara bounds downstairs, Eliza is waiting. She’s already smiling, mostly due to the contagious nature of Kara’s excitement, and she just laughs when the pancakes she makes are gone in minutes.

“Come on!” Kara urges, dragging both of the other Danvers women out of the house, eager to head for the train station. She’s already gotten all of them out the door when she realizes she’s forgotten her trunk, and she has to go back to get it.

When they finally make it to the train station, Kara’s blown away by how many people there are, until Alex explains that not everyone is here for Hogwarts. Most of them are just regular muggles, going about their day to day lives, getting on trains to go to work, or wherever else they need to be.

It’s after that when Alex shows her how to actually get to Platform Nine and Three Quarters. Kara’s mesmerized by the sight of the luggage cart disappearing into the wall, her sister following it. She’s nervous, too, that she’ll mess it up somehow, bounce right off instead of going through, but Eliza gives her a reassuring feeling and nudges her forward, so she steels herself to try.

It’s an odd feeling, phasing through a wall. Odd, because it doesn’t feel weird at all. Just like running, only one second she’s surrounded by oblivious muggles, and the next she’s standing beside her sister in a sea of students, the Hogwarts Express ready to go only a few meters away.

Kara gives a soft gasp when she sees it for the first time, and Alex reaches out to wrap a hand around her elbow with a smile. “Exciting, huh?” She asks, and Kara only nods, mute.

They’re both distracted by the shout, someone calling Alex’s name, and Kara turns to see Lucy Lane coming up, trailed by a tall boy she doesn’t recognize.

“You made it to Hogwarts, finally,” Lucy teases, when she sees Kara, and pulls the younger girl into a short hug. Kara smiles, a little sheepish, as if she was only getting to Hogwarts now because she was slow, not because she was too young.

Alex shakes her head, shoves at Lucy’s shoulder. “Kara, you know Lucy,” she says, turning to her sister as she gestures towards the youngest Lane, before waving her arm towards the boy. “And this is Jimmy.”

He coughs. “James,” he corrects.

“James,” Alex amends, and there’s something apologetic in her eyes. Kara knows it has to do with last year, with everything that happened between them and Clark and Lex Luthor, about the battle, but Alex hadn’t spoken much about it when she came home, hadn’t wanted to. Most of what Kara knew, really, came from the handful of times Alex had woken up from nightmares with her chest heaving and her sheets soaked in sweat.

Moving on from the correction, Alex wraps her arm around her sister. “James, this is my sister Kara,” she introduces, tugging the blonde further into her side.

“Hi,” Kara says, smiling despite the nerves in her stomach.

“Hey, nice to meet you,” he replies. “Alex talks very highly about you. And also, a lot about you.”

“Shut up, James,” Alex grumbles.

From there, they dissolve into conversation. ‘They’ being Alex, Lucy, and James. Kara instead, finds herself glancing back at the train still sitting there, like it’s waiting for her.

Alex, noticing her sister’s wandering eye, jostles Kara a little to catch her attention. “We can get on the train now, if you want,” she offers, tilting her head, but Kara waves her off.

“You guys can keep talking,” she tells her. “Don’t mind me, I can take care of myself.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m fine,” Kara insists, beaming, as she takes her luggage cart and wheels away.

The first step she takes inside the train feels right. It’s almost like something in her is slotting into place, like this is where she’s meant to be, and she can’t help the massive smile that crosses her lips.

The train is still mostly empty, so she finds her own compartment, easy, and curls up to wait for Alex. However, the figures that appear in the doorway of the carriage maybe six minutes later are not Alex and her friends, but two boys, one with dirty blond hair, similar to her own shade, and another, shorter boy, with brown hair that looks like it could stand to be brushed a couple more times.

“Hi,” the first boy says, one hand on his suitcase and the other on the back of his neck. “Is it okay if we sit in here with you? The other compartments are starting to fill up.”

“No problem!” Kara chirps, and he smiles at her before he steps in, the shorter guy following behind him. For a minute, they just stand there, rather awkward.

“Um, I’m Winn,” the second boy, the one with the dark, messy hair, says, finally breaking the silence.

“Barry,” the first boy adds, offering his hand to shake. “Allen.”

“Kara,” she replies, mimicking the way she said it. “Danvers, that is.”

Barry grins at her, Winn managing a smaller smile beside him, and it gives Kara a gut feeling, one that says _‘hold on to them, they matter.”_

-

Logically, Kara knows there’s nothing to be scared of.

First of all, it’s just a hat. A hat that talks, yes, but a hat nonetheless. And all they’re going to do is put the hat on her head so it can read her mind, nothing alarming there.

It shouldn’t frighten her at all, really. Every single student that passes through the castle does it at some point, and the whole purpose of it is to put them in the right house, where they belong. It’s like one of those tests where’s there’s no wrong answer, but it still doesn’t stop her from fidgeting.

One of the first students to go is Barry, having a last name that starts with A, and he shoots her a cheesy grin before stepping up and taking a seat on the stool. They drop the Sorting Hat on his head, and there’s a long moment that passes in silence before the hat makes it’s decision, calling out a _“Hufflepuff!”_ that echoes through the Great Hall. The table of students dressed in gold and black roar in approval as Barry goes over to join them, taking a seat on one of the benches.

They go through a few more names, and Kara finds herself unable to sit still knowing that being a Danvers puts her as one of the first students to go. She wonders what it would be like if she still had the last name of her family, if she were still a Zorel, waiting for the end of the alphabet to be called up.

She’s snapped out of her thoughts when she hears her name called, and with a step that is far less shaky than she feels, she clambers up to the stage to have the hat placed on her head. The second it touches her, Kara can sense it reading her, like she could feel the eyes it didn’t have skimming her body.

“Ah, the youngest Danvers,” it hums, and although it’s voice is deep and gravely, it’s also a strange sort of comforting. “I sorted your sister only last year. And in many ways, I can already see how you’re incredibly alike and incredibly different. Where she carried the intelligence of a Ravenclaw and the ambition of a Slytherin, you have a Gryffindor’s courage, but more importantly, a Hufflepuff’s heart. You could fit in with the house of the lions, maybe, but your loyalty, your warmth? You’d make a far better Hufflepuff.”

Later, she’ll think about how it compared her to her sister, how it made her feel weird, being measured against Alex, but for now, all she can focus on is the way it lists houses before choosing which one to settle on. When it makes it’s choice, she starts to smile before it calls out the name to the whole Great Hall, and that same table that cheered for Barry is now doing the same for her.

When she scrambles over there, there’s a smiling girl already standing at the front of the table, her long brown hair pulled back and a badge shining on the chest of her robes. “My name is Olivia Marsdin,” she says, reaching out to shake Kara’s hand. “I’m the Head Girl. Anything you need help with, you can come to me for, alright?”

Kara nods, mute, and falls into an empty seat at the table, right beside Barry. He laughs, throwing an arm over her shoulder like they’ve been friends for years, and she only grins at him as the next student stands to be sorted.

(She knows she’s only just met him, but a part of her feels like she was always supposed to know him.)

-

(Breakfast the next morning is it’s own sort of wonderful.  
Alex and Lucy are already there, laughing over their plates of food, and when Barry turns up, his arm is around Winn, pulling him over to the table.

When James shows up, he smiles at them all and there’s a definite sense of belonging in the air.)

-

She runs into Clark for the first time in the halls on the way to class a week and a half in the year.

Kara grins when she sees them. Yes, she loves the Danvers, but she’s always looked up to Clark. He was the last of the Zorel bloodline, the last member left of her birth family on either side. She’s always wished she saw Clark more, always wished she could spend more time with him. It was one of the reasons she was so excited to go to Hogwarts, so when she sees him only a few feet ahead of her, she grins.

“Clark!” She calls. “Clark!”

He turns on his heel when he hears her, and it takes a moment before he sees her. When he does notice her, he smiles, small and a little… off.

“Kara,” he greets, as she runs up to fall into step beside him. “Hey, how are you?”

“I’m good!” She replies. “I’m really good. I’ve always wanted to come to Hogwarts, I’m really excited to be here!”

“That’s good,” he says, glancing down at her robes. “Hufflepuff, huh?”

“Oh, yeah! I didn’t really know which house I wanted to be in, but I really like Hufflepuff. The dorms and the common rooms are so pretty, and everyone’s been really nice so far. Olivia, she’s the head girl, she’s been really nice and helpful and-”

Kara cuts herself off when she notices they’ve come to a stop. She looks up to see to see Clark staring down at her, eyes soft.

“Sorry, Kara, this is my class,” he apologizes. “But… we’ll catch up soon, okay?”

“Okay,” she agrees, voice falling a little, and he claps her on the shoulder before disappearing inside the open door they’re standing by. Kara stands there, staring at the empty space he was standing in, before she pulls her books tighter to her chest and scurries off to her classroom, trying to keep her chin tilted up despite the way her shoulders slump down.

(She tries to push the interaction of her mind, because for her and Clark, soon really means much, much later.)

-

Kara meets Lena for the first time is through Winn.

It’s the first friend, or acquaintance even, that Winn’s made since coming to Hogwarts, save for Kara, Barry, and all their friends. And when he tells them that he wants to bring his potions partner to sit with them, at least once, Kara’s all for the idea.

The next day, he shows up dinner humming with excitement, and a few minutes later, he’s waving a girl over to their table. “I saved you a seat,” he tells her, falling down onto the bench, and she smiles at him as she sits beside him, but it looks nervous.

“Lena, this is James and Lucy.” Winn says, pointing to the both of them. “James is in his third year, Lucy’s in her second.”

They both give her grins, but from beside Lucy, Kara can see the that she’s holding James’ hand under the table, her knuckles slowly turning white. Winn, blissfully unaware, continues.

“And these two dorks here are Kara and Barry,” he continues, gesturing to each of the Hufflepuffs in turn. “They’re first years, like us.”

Winn sits back when he finishes, and James stares at him until he can catch Winn’s gaze. When they make eye contact, the older boy quirks an eyebrow, and it takes a minute before realization dawns on Winn’s face.

“Oh yeah, right,” he adds. “Guys, this is my friend Lena.”

Lena ducks her head, a small smile on her face. Across the table, Lucy makes a noise that sounds close to a snort, leaning forward to rest her elbow on the table, propping her chin up with the hand that isn’t gripping James’.

“My condolences, Lena,” she says. “Having to be friends with this kid over here.”

Winn squawks in protest, eyes wide in mock offense. “Hey, aren’t _you_ my friend?”

Lucy shrugs her shoulders in response, a small grin starting to pull up the corners of her lips. “Eh, the last time I checked, you were just the little Ravenclaw boy Kara and Barry picked up on the train.”

Winn sits back, wearing a scowl. “Aw, you know she’s just messing with you, Winnie,” he says, still laughing himself. “We love you and your genius brain.”

Winn mutters, rolling his eyes as he throws off the arm Barry’s slung around his shoulder, still pretending to be offended. James, chuckling, starts to turn the conversation somewhere else, and Kara turns to Lena.

“Sorry about all of them,” she says, waving towards the other four at at the table. “But yeah, I’m Kara. It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too,” Lena replies. Kara shoots her a smile, the warmest she can manage, and she’s pleased when Lena returns it, a little more hesitant but still bright.

Under the table, Kara notices that Lucy’s hand is no longer wrapped around James’ in a death grip, and after that, Lena becomes a regular fixture at their table.

-

Lena fits in well with them.

Or she seems to, at least. She’s quiet, especially when she first starts to sit with them, but over time, she starts to talk more and more, coming out of her shell at the table. Kara’ll admit, she was a little nervous when she found out Winn’s new friend was Lex Luthor’s younger sister, but it was less about who Lena was and more about how her other friends would react, namely Alex, James, and Lucy.

Even that hasn’t been a problem though, because Alex studied with Lena all of one time before she decided that Lena was alright. Alex wouldn’t tell her what happened, only that it went well,, but Kara noticed afterwards the way her sister seemed to talk to Lena more than anyone else at the table did, save for Winn.

She likes Lena too, sure, but she doesn’t really know her. To Kara, Lena’s a little bit of a mystery. Sometimes, she just doesn’t show up to the table on random days of the week, but Kara discovers the reason on her own one day when she looks across the Great Hall to see Lena sitting in the seat across the table from Cat Grant.

So when she stumbles across Lena sat alone at a table in the library, she hesitates a moment before walking over.

“Lena, hey!” She chirps.

Lena, caught off guard, jolts, head snapping up, but she relaxes a little when she realizes who called her name.

“Do you mind if I sit?” Kara asks, and Lena just blinks at her for a second before nodding.

“Yeah, sure, of course,” she replies, and in response, Kara beams, letting her bag fall to the ground as she slides into one of the empty chairs, leaning down to pull out her books and supplies. Across the table, Lena’s copying the tidy scrawl from one sheet of paper to another, quill flying across the paper as she hums.

“Are you copying an extra set of notes for Winn?” Kara asks, breaking the silence that’s fallen between them, and Lena nods.

“It’d be unfortunate if my Potions partner fell behind and accidentally blew us up the next time we mixed something in class,” she says, her lips turning up in the hint of a smile. Kara laughs.

“That sounds like a Winn thing to do,” she replies. A moment later, realizing she’s just implied she would expect to Winn to cause an explosion in their class, she tries to backtrack.

“Not that I think Winn is going to blow you up or anything, he’s very smart, and-”

Lena cuts her off with a chuckle, soft and low. “Don’t worry, I’d never let him blow up our lab,” she tells Kara. “I mean, how our poor grades would suffer, I could never!”

Lena places a hand over her chest, sighing dramatically, and Kara laughs, forgetting for a moment that they’re in the library. Across the table, Lena’s eyes are crinkling at the corners with her smile, and in that minute, Kara decides the best thing Winn has ever done was bring Lena to their table.

-

Seven people is too many for one train compartment. Looking at one should be enough to know that, but that doesn’t really deter Kara from convincing everyone to stuff themselves together in the same carriage, even if it means that she gets stuffed between Lena and the window, and Barry ends up at the floor by her and Alex’s feet.

It’s not comfortable, not really, but they make it work. The woman pushing the trolley raises an eyebrow when she sees them all shoved together, but she cares less when they all buy candy, Kara especially.

“So, kiddos, how was your first year at Hogwarts?” Lucy asks, halfway into the ride. By now, she’s given up on trying to throw candy into James’ mouth and instead has her legs in his lap, her head in Alex’s lap.

“It was great,” Kara answers, grinning. “I mean, everything was so…”

“Magical?” Lena supplies, a wry smile on her face. Kara nods, rather enthusiastically, missing the irony. James tips his head backs and laughs, Lena echoing with a snort, but Kara ignores it to keep talking.

“I mean, I’ve never seen so much magic in one place,” Kara explains. “And I got to meet all of you, and there was so much food, at every meal! Plus, the Hufflepuff dorms are amazing. They’re so bright, and the common room is so warm! It makes me want to go home and redecorate my entire room in different shades of yellow!”

“Um, we share that room,” Alex interrupts. “You will _not_ be turning it into your own, personal Hufflepuff cave. I’m not agreeing to that, no matter how long you pout.”

“But _Alex,”_ Kara whines. “I’ll let you tear out the outside wall and put in bigger windows.”

“You might be okay with that, but I doubt mom will agree,” the Ravenclaw points out. “That’s called construction, which costs this thing called money? You may have heard of it, it doesn’t grow on trees.”

“I have a trust fund-”

“You are not using your trust fund to make our bedroom window bigger,” Alex replies. “That’s just- no. No.”

“I think you’re going to lose this one, Kar,” Barry interjects, placing a hand on the other Hufflepuff’s knee. “You might as well give in before you dig a deeper hole for yourself.”

Kara huffs, landing a soft kick on Barry’s upper thigh, and he only rolls his eyes, turning to Lena. “Do you see what I have to deal with?” He asks, a hand on his chest.

“Well, she’s not that bad,” Lena defends. In response, Kara grins.

“At least Lena loves me,” she sighs, leaning into the other girl’s side. “So much for house loyalty, Barry.”

“Kara, since when has our group cared about house loyalty?” He fires back. “The seven of us cover all four houses, there’s no more than two of us in each house.”

“Houses don’t really matter for us,” Winn adds, leaning forward in his seat. “Besides, wouldn’t it be, like, boring if we were only friends with people in our own houses?”

“It’d certainly suck for me,” Lena agrees. “I mean, have you seen my house?”

“I have,” Lucy replies. “In fact, I would call it… a house of snakes.”

James and Lena both groan, shaking their head, as the older boy shoves Lucy’s feet off of his lap. “You’ve made terrible jokes before, Luce,” he tells her. “But that was just… bad.”

“Says you,” she mutters, folding her arms as she turns to Alex. “Lexie, weigh in.”

“First of all, no,” Alex responds. “Just… never call me Lexie again. And second of all, I’m with literally everyone else in here, your joke was really, really bad.”

“Suddenly, I’m going to miss you all less over the summer.”

“Oh, ha ha, don’t be bitter, Luce,” James says. “You know you’ll miss us.”

“Yeah, I will,” she admits with a sigh, and as Kara looks around at everyone crowded into the compartment, she finds that she’s inclined to agree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rt if you support lucy calling alex 'lexie'


	2. look at the stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara’s second year is easy. The only thing that’s really hard is trying to beat Barry at Exploding Snap.
> 
> or, i finally give context to why kara doesn’t like leslie, and j’onn makes a surprise appearance

The first time Kara sees Winn and Barry after being apart the whole summer, the first thing she notices about either of them is Barry’s hair. It’s darker now, just a tinge, and his slight shag from last year’s grown out, down to his ears with some falling onto his forehead. Winn describes it as a ‘very surfer boy look’, but Kara guesses that’s more of a muggle reference, because all she knows of surfing is from that month the Danvers took her to the American West Coast, when Alex convinced Jeremiah to teach her how to ‘ride the waves’.

Still, Barry pouts through all of their teasing, as Kara drops into one of the seats and spreads out over Winn to make herself comfortable. He stares at her, brow furrowed, but when she meets his gaze, he blinks at her once before glancing away, with a slight red tinge to his cheek. She brushes it off, because she sure she’s caught herself zoning out before while her gaze was still focused on one of her friends more than once.

She’s set to make another comment about Barry’s hair when, outside the window to the hallway, she sees a flash of silver and brown and green. When she looks up, there’s Lena, walking past with an almost dazed look in her eye, something she only catches for a second. Barry notices, too, and with a grin, he jumps to his feet and pokes his head out the door, calling the brunette’s name.

There’s a pause as his smile grows, and then Lena reappears, all but giggling when Barry throws his arm around her shoulder in a hug before nudging her inside. Kara beams at her, and it’s returned, albeit a little more shy.

Closing the door behind him, Barry takes a step inside and bumps Lena’s hip with his own. She turns around to look at him, and there’s a moment of silence before-

“Nice hair.”

Kara and Winn both lose it at that. Winn makes a joke and Kara shoves at him, both of them still laughing. Barry tugs at the locks falling into his face and tries to maintain an offended look, but he can’t help giving in.

“It’s not that bad,” he protests, and Kara snorts. Lena turns and gives him a skeptical look, one eyebrow arched.

“Sure, Barry,” she says, her voice a sickly sweet kind of sarcastic, and Kara bits her lip to try and stop the way her lips pull at the corners. Barry huffs, folding his arms over his chest and throwing himself back into the seat.

“You guys are mean,” he whines.

“Aw, you know you missed us,” Kara points out, and even if he rolls his eyes, she can see the small grin, confirming that yes, he did miss them.

-

The first chance she gets, Kara’s needled both Barry and Lena into going to the courtyard with her to study, but it’s kind of an unspoken rule that without anyone else to help keep them focused, they won’t be doing any actual studying. Lena’s the only one who even bothers to bring her Charms textbook, but within two minutes, Kara’s convinced her to set it aside and take a nap instead. Barry manages to fall asleep without anyone telling him to, head falling forward from where he’s propped against the wall.

Kara’s not all that tired, not really, but she lays back anyway, tucking her hands underneath her head and staring up the sky. Above her, the clouds drift past in a way that seems almost lazy, as if they’re going nowhere and have all the time in the world to get there. It’s relaxing, and she finds herself lost in thought, thinking about nothing of real importance as the minutes that tick by turn into an hour, and then some, until it’s been nearly two and Barry’s starting to wake up.

When he finally lifts his head, he blinks a couple times before stretching, rolling his shoulders back with a yawn. Kara sits up, crossing her legs and tucking her feet beneath them as Barry slides closer to her.

“Good morning,” he says. “How long did I sleep?”

She shrugs in response, and Barry takes that as a good enough answer. After a beat, he reaches over to pull his bag closer, sliding out a box from inside.

“D’you wanna play Exploding Snap?”

“Sure,” Kara replies, and he grins in a way that says she has no idea what she’s just gotten herself into as he opens the deck and lets the cards slide out. He makes quick work of setting up the game, and Kara pulls her wand out of her pocket to play.

“Have you played before?” He asks, and she nods.

“Alex taught me,” she tells him, which, okay, may not be the whole truth, but most days, it’s easier to say that than talk about her adoptive father. These days, even if they think about him, nobody really talks about Jeremiah.

(Sometimes, when it’s quiet, and the only people around are Kara and her sister, Alex will bring him up as if he were a ghost, her voice soft and her eyes too haunted for a girl who’s only thirteen.)

She pushes thoughts of Jeremiah aside as Barry grabs his own wand, and she soon finds herself distracted, drawn into the game and out of her own head. They play Exploding Snap until the sky starts to color and Lena starts to stir, making soft noises in her sleep before her eyes finally blink open. Barry’s quick to assure her that once this round is over, he’s happy to play one with her, throwing in a jab about beating Kara first. It’s fair, no matter her protest, because he’s beaten her every time they’ve played today.

Kara pouts, but Lena and Barry both laugh, and really? That’s what matters.

-

The first time she saw Lena walking with Leslie Willis, she brushed it off. Or she tried to, at least, as she stared after the two of them disappearing around a corner on the way to the Slytherin dungeon with her eyes narrowed. Still, she counts it as a fluke until, of course, she catches it again.

(Kara has never really liked Leslie Willis.

They used to be neighbors once upon a time, for the few years the Willis family lived next door before they moved into a wizarding town. Kara and Leslie had never really gotten along, even from the beginning. Leslie had always been a little bit of a brat, leering at Kara and Alex from her back porch whenever the sisters were outside in their yard.

“Hey princess,” she’d call, hopping up on the tips of her toes to lean out onto the railing of her porch, hair already starting to frizz from the humidity. “Isn’t it a little hot outside for you today? Aren’t mommy and daddy worried about you burning that precious little face of yours?”

“Back off, Willis,” Alex’d reply, a scowl twisting her face. “Leave her alone.”

It never really helped, having Alex jump into try and fight her battles for her, but that never really stopped her from trying. Leslie would only laugh, high and loud in that childlike sort of way, dancing back inside her house and sliding the glass doors closed behind there, leaving the Danvers sisters alone in the backyard, Alex with her fists clenched and Kara standing behind her.

So yeah, Kara’s never really liked Leslie Willis, even after the girl moved away. Even when they got to school, Kara held onto her distaste for the girl.)

So when she sees Lena sitting with her at a meal, both of them bent over something on the table and laughing, she doesn’t like it. Lena’s her friend, one of her closest friends, and she’ll admit that she doesn’t like seeing them together.

She tries to be subtle about it, but she doesn’t think she’s doing a very good job about it, because James catches her staring at the across the room and blinks at her.

“Something wrong, Supergirl?” He asks, stifling a laugh. Her cheeks flare red, both from the use of the nickname and the fact that he caught her scowling at Lena and Leslie across the hall.

“Nope,” she squeaks, reaching for her glasses and pushing them further up her nose. “Nothing at all, everything is one hundred percent fine, I am fine.”

“Really?” He replies. “Because from the way you were just glaring at Leslie Willis, it looks like you were trying create lasers with your eyes to burn a hole in her head.”

“I’m not!” Kara sputters, but James only gives her a grin as he turns back to his food.

“Whatever you say, Kar,” he assures her, his tone mocking. “Whatever you say.”

Kara sticks her lip out in a pout, crossing her arms over her chest. Alex picks that moment to appear, sliding into the seat beside her sister. “What’s with that look?” She asks.

“James is being mean!” Kara answers, and Alex stares at her for a solid ten seconds before turning to James, folding her hands together and raising an eyebrow.

“Lena is having lunch with Leslie Willis and Kara’s pretending she’s not upset about it when she is,” he explains, and Alex, rather than seeming satisfied, scrunches her nose.

“Lena’s having lunch with Leslie Willis?”

“Yeah!” Kara exclaims with wide eyes, leaning forward. “Like, right over there!”

Alex glances over to the two girls before turning back to the table, face pinched. “Why?”

“Exactly! Thank you,” Kara replies, before turning to shoot daggers at James. “ _Someone_ gets it.”

James only glances between them, almost shocked. “Seriously? Both of you.”

“Leslie’s the worst,” Kara defends, shoving a forkful of food into her mouth to avoid having to say anything else. He turns to Alex, looking for her to elaborate, but she only shrugs and takes a sip of her juice.

“You two are unbelievable,” he says, shaking her head, and Alex grins.

“You’re the one who still hangs out with us,” she fires back, and he laughs as he turns back to his own plate, still shaking his head.

“Unbelievable,” he repeats, but it lacks weight when he smiles.

Kara glances back over her shoulder, where Lena and Leslie are still huddled together, and she clenches her jaw once before tearing her eyes away, pointedly ignoring the look Alex gives her, because it’s _fine_.

It really is fine, in the end, because when she shows up the next morning for breakfast, Lena is already there and chatting with everyone else. Kara slides into the spot between her and Alex with a bright grin, grabbing food the second her butt hits the bench.

“Morning guys,” she greets, after she’s already shoved her mouth full, and they all laugh at her. Their attention, however, is drawn away when a tall guy in Gryffindor robes slides into the space beside James.

It’s her cousin, Clark.

“Hey Jimmy,” he says, arm around James, before he turns to her. “Hey Kara.”

“Hey Clark,” she replies, her eyes lighting up as a grin spreads across her face. “It’s been a while.”

“That it has,” he tells her. “Too long, kiddo.”

She all but preens for a moment, back straightening. Out of the corner of her eye, however, she sees Lena tense up beside her, and she reaches out to grab the other girl’s hand.

“Are you alright?” She asks. Lena blinks at her, almost as if she’s surprised.

“I’m fine,” she assures, but Kara doesn’t really believe that glint in her eye. “I just zoned out, that’s all.”

“Okay,” Kara hums, squeezing Lena’s fingers with her own before letting them go. Clark says something to get her attention, and she turns to him to catch whatever he’s just said to them.

A minute later, Barry comes tearing up to the table, snatching a piece of toast off of Kara’s plate as he reminds her and Lena they have to hurry to get to their first class, and she’s surprised to see the relief on Lena’s face.

-

(Alex tells her about her Herbology partner before Kara actually meets the girl.

Her name’s Maggie. She’s a Gryffindor, in the same class with Alex and Lucy. Her sister, apparently likes the girl, enough that she wants to invite her to eat lunch at their table, and Kara agrees easily.

“If you like her, I’ll like her,” she says, and Alex smiles.

“You will,” she assures. “I promise.”)

-

(She doesn’t like Maggie at first, not when she drops Lena’s last name as a form of greeting.

Lena is so much more than a Luthor. She is more than her brother’s sister, her parent’s daughter, and the thought of someone narrowing Lena to just her last name makes her skin crawl.

Lena doesn’t see it like that, though, and she goes out of her way to explain it to Kara.

“If she called me something different because of my last name, that would bother me, but she doesn’t.”

That night, she smiles at Maggie over dinner, and she doesn’t regret it when, beside her, Lena’s grin splits her face open.)

-

Winn is acting kind of… odd around her lately.

Kara doesn’t quite notice it at first. Alex’s always teased her for being oblivious, but it had always been somewhat good-naturedly. While she’s always known her sister’s words held at least a little bit of truth, she’s never put that much stock in them.

Maybe that’s why it takes her so long to see it. They’re several months into the school year when she finally starts to notice the way Winn’s cheeks will seem to turn red out of nowhere, how he tends to stutter more around her, or the way she sometimes catches him looking at her out of the corner of her eyes when he thinks nobody’s watching.

It’s… a little weird. Winn’s her friend, so she isn’t terribly upset, mostly confused. Therefore, she does what she always does when she doesn’t understand something: ask Alex.

Alex merely raises an eyebrow once Kara explains the situation. For a long second, her sister just holds eye contact and stares, as if the answer is something she should already know.

“What?” Kara asks.

“You seriously don’t know?” Alex replies.

“Well, that’s why I came to you,” the blonde replies, a little bit of irritation flaring in her chest. Alex snorts, closes the book she was reading and pushes it aside.

“He has a crush on you, Kar,” she explains.

Kara blinks, falling into silence for a whole half of a minute before she regains the ability to speak. “I’m sorry, what?”

Alex laughs. “He’s got a crush on you,” she repeats. “Like, everyone’s noticed.”

_“Everyone?”_

“Okay, well, I have,” Alex amends. “And so have Lucy and Maggie.”

“Oh,” Kara murmurs, in a soft state of shock. “What about James?”

“He’s still convinced that Winn has a crush on Lena,” her sister says, prompting Kara to a double take.

“Why does everyone assume Winn has a crush on someone?”

“Okay, to be fair, we all thought Winn had a crush on Lena last year,” Alex explains. “I mean, he was so excited to introduce us all to Lena, we kind of just thought it was because he liked her.”

Kara pauses. “Then why are you so sure he has a crush on me?”

“Kara, you’ve noticed it,” the older girl says. “The blushing and the stammering and the staring. What do you think it means?”

Alex fixes her with a stare until Kara slumps, resigned.

“Is this going to make things awkward?”

“Have things been awkward so far?”

“No.”

“Then no,” Alex says. “Things are only going to be awkward if the two of you make them awkward.”

“Okay,” Kara hums, before sliding closer and leaning into her sister’s side.

“Of course, Kara,” Alex replies, wrapping an arm around Kara’s shoulder. “I’m always here for you.”

-

It’s a horrible idea. A terrible suggestion, really, and she doesn’t even know why somebody would ever dare try to convince her to do it. Seriously, how _awful_ can you be-

“Kara, you need to eat some vegetables.”

Kara pouts. Beside her, Lena is waving a spoon in her face, like you would with a toddler, trying to to force a couple of green beans into her mouth. Quite petulantly, Kara crosses her arms and turns her chin up, ignoring the way the rest of the table’s begun to laugh at their antics.

“Kara, they’re good for you,” Lena insists.

“Yeah Kara, they’re good for you,” Alex repeats from her other side, her lips turned up in a smirk. “Why don’t you just eat your vegetables?”

“They’re gross,” Kara states, rather matter of fact, refusing to look at either of them. “They have no business being on my plate, inside of my body, or around me in general.”

“Don’t you think you’re being a little over dramatic?” Lena asks.

“No!” Kara protests. “The whole point of me coming to school and being away from Eliza was that there weren’t any parents to make me eat any vegetables, thank you very much!”

“I thought the point was for you to learn magic,” Alex teases. “You know, considering we’re here at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, we all have wands, should I go on?”

“Learning magic is trivial,” Kara snarks, and at the wrong moment, too, because she hears a throat being cleared and she turns around to see Headmaster J’onzz standing behind her, an eyebrow raised.

“Not exactly something you’d really want to hear from one of your students,” he says, and Kara can feel the heat rushing into her cheeks as she gapes up at him.

“Headmaster J’onzz, I- I was just,” she stammers, trying to come up with an explanation, and he cuts her off by laughing, low and gruff.

“No need to explain, Miss Danvers,” he replies, clapping her once on the shoulder. “Carry on.”

With that, he continues on his way up the aisle between tables, and once he’s gotten far enough away from them, Kara props her elbows onto the table and lets her head fall into her hands with a long, drawn out groan. Both Lucy and Alex snort, while Lena rests a comforting hand on her back, biting her lip to try and stifle her own laughter

“You know, you really should just eat your vegetables next time, Kar,” Alex tells her, and she lifts her head up to fix her sister with a hard glare, eyes narrowed.

“Shut _up_ , Alex.”

-

At the end of her second year, they all have to pick their electives. Kara and Barry both know, right away, that they’re going to take Care Of Magical Creatures together. They’ve been planning it since their first year. They’d asked Winn if he wanted to take it with them, but the Ravenclaw was quick to abstain, citing that the larger sorts of creatures were ‘not his thing’, as he put it.

Winn does agree to take Ancient Runes with her, however, already planning on taking Magical Theory and Arithmancy but looking to take a third course. Divination wasn’t up his alley, he said, and he didn’t really want to ‘study’ muggles when he’d spent his whole life living among them with his mother. It’s a fair point, Kara thinks, and it means she won’t be the only one of her friends in her year taking Ancient Runes, so she’s really not in a position to complain about it.

Kara’s a little abhorred when she finds out about Lena’s picks for classes. Not the actual classes themselves, but her reasons for taking them. Lena’s plan is to choose all the classes her mother wants her to take, and while the two of them don’t really talk about the Luthor matriarch, Lena doesn’t seem to be all that fond of her. Certainly not in the way that Barry and Winn are of their own mothers, or how she and Alex are with Eliza, so Kara’s not really all that happy about the idea that Lena’s basing her life choices on what someone else wants.

“You should be taking what you want, not the boring classes your mother does,” she tells the other girl. “You should take Care of Magical Creatures with me and Barry, it’d be so much fun! We could study together!”

Lena raises an eyebrow at her, almost amused. “Us ‘studying’ together means hanging out in the courtyard and not getting any work done,” she replies. “We already do that, and we don’t have to be in the same courses to avoid doing anything.”

“But it would still be fun,” Kara argues. “Plus, we might have the same period!”

“We’ll see,” Lena says, with a snort. “Besides, we’ve got another week or two before we have to pick our classes, I’ve got plenty of time to think about it.”

“Take what you want to take,” Barry tells her, and his voice is soft. “You owe it to yourself.”

A week later, Lena comes into lunch after picking her classes, and all three of the other second years are on her in a minute, watching her with prying eyes as they wait for her to tell them what classes she picked. At first, she just ignores them, reaching to grab a sandwich from the spread on the table. It’s only once Kara starts to whine beside her that she gives in, laughing.

“I’m taking Magical Theory, Muggle Studies, and Care of Magical Creatures,” she tells them, prompting both Barry and Kara to cheer while Winn claps, leaving the rest of the table to stare at them all in confusion.

“How does it feel?” Barry asks, once they’ve quieted down.

Lena grins. “It feels… kind of great,” she answers, and Kara throws her arm around the girl, beaming.

“Told ya so,” she teases, laughing when Lena reaches up to smack her in the side.

Still, all four of them are smiling, and even if everyone else has no idea what’s going on, it’s still a good moment.

-

She spends the last day before the train ride home outside in the courtyard with Lena, Barry, and Winn, the four of them sat in a loose imitation of a circle around a Wizard Chess board. For the most part, Lena’s been wiping the floor with everyone, and Barry and Winn are holding their own when playing against each other. By this point, Kara’s lost so many times that it’s rather miserable, giving up on playing to join Lena’s team, which basically means trying to help from time to time and taking some of the credit when Lena wins. Nobody really protests or brings it up, though, because this is what playing games with Kara usually ends up like.

Barry is trying his best to take out Winn’s queen and surround his king when Kara leans into Lena’s side with a yawn. Above them, the sky is slowing losing light, blue fading into shades of red as the sun sets.

“Are you tired?” Lena asks. Kara only nods, pressing her cheek to the other girl’s shoulder.

“You can go to sleep, you know,” she adds.

“I don’t wanna go to sleep yet,” Kara protests. “Tomorrow, we’re all leaving and going home. I’m not going to see you all again until the next school year starts.”

“So you’re extorting your body?”

“You make it sound so much worse than it is,” Kara accuses with a scowl. Lena tips her head back and laughs, soft, as Barry sacrifices his bishop to take one of Winn’s knights.

“You can take a nap, Kara,” Lena suggests. “You love napping.”

“I don’t love napping,” she replies, but when she says that, both Barry and Winn turn to give her incredulous looks.

“Kara, nearly every time I walk into the common room, you’re asleep on the couch,” Barry points out.

“You once told me that if you ever started a religion, it would be based on napping,” Winn adds.

Kara’s cheeks flush. “Okay, so I love napping,” she concedes. “But I don’t wanna nap _now_.”

“Go to sleep, Kara,” Lena tells her. Kara pouts, for a second, before giving in, sliding down to make herself comfortable in Lena’s lap. After a moment, there’s a hand skimming up and down her back, and she allows herself to be lulled to sleep when that hand moves up to comb through her hair and scratch at her scalp.

She wakes later, on the last day before the year ends, to the first couple of stars twinkling above her, and Lena insisting they need to hurry up and sneak back inside the castle, because curfew has long since past.

(It’s a good last day of the year.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m really not going to lie, the main reason i miss mos so much compared to this is because lena was so much angstier than kara, it was more fun.


	3. your skin and bones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara gets a boyfriend, Lena acts a little weird, and the two may or may not be connected to each other.
> 
> or, I have an obsession with writing rock skipping scenes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> right now, the thing i miss most about lena’s pov is being able to write angst about lex. also, i flippin miss leslie, bro.  
> [sorry this chapter is a couple hours late!!]

Kara spends the night before her first day back at Hogwarts on her new cellphone, skyping Winn.

Neither of them have done more than five minutes of packing, and as such, they both have nearly empty trunks despite the fact that they both have to leave tomorrow.

They spend more time talking than they actually do getting their luggage in order, but they manage to finish up. They stay on the phone for a good long while after they’ve finished, just talking, until Alex herself comes barging in and smacking Kara with a pillow, telling her to go to bed. Kara laughs, but obliges, saying goodnight to Winn before curling up to go to sleep.

She wakes up at a time that feels far too early, and even though she’s excited, she can feel her eyelids drooping. She manages to be chipper and upbeat by the time they make it to the station, and she greets her friends with wide smiles and laughter.

Beyond the very beginning of the ride to school, Kara doesn’t remember any of it. Maybe ten minutes after the train takes off, she dozes into sleep. When she wakes up a good while later, her head is pillowed in Lena’s lap and, thankfully, the other girl has had the foresight to buy her candy while she was asleep.

(Kara thanks her profusely, shoving three handfuls of chocolate in her mouth before curling up against Lena and going right back to sleep as if she never woke up.

Nobody is surprised.)

-

Kara decides that she loves Care of Magical Creatures after the first class.

The first Wednesday of the new school year, Kara finds herself racing Barry and Lena out to the Gamekeeper’s grounds. Well, racing Barry while she holds onto Lena’s hand and pulls the other girl behind her, laughing the whole way.

Barry wins, of course, because he’s always been faster than them, on and off a broom. It doesn’t help that both Lena and Kara are laughing a bit too much and tripping over each other. He takes pity on them and waits for them not too far off from the doors to outside, grinning like the cat who swallowed the canary.

The second they’re close enough for him to reach out, he motions for Lena to pass him the thermos of pumpkin juice she’d brought. In response, Lena raises an eyebrow, unscrews the lid, and takes a long swig all without breaking eye contact. When she’s done, she passes it to Kara, who laughs before sipping some from the top. She’s about to pass it back to Lena when Barry starts to pout, turning his wide, brown eyes on her. She glances back and forth between him and Lena for a moment before sighing and giving in, pressing the thermos into his outstretched palm.

_“Kara!”_

Barry whoops in celebration, chugging some down while Lena scowls. Once he’s decided he’s down, he hands it over to Lena, who’s smiling even as she continues to pretend she’s upset.

The three of them make their way down the rest of the path to class, Kara grabbing Lena’s hand and threading her arm through Barry’s own, all but vibrating in excitement.

They’re the first ones there when they arrive. Save for the Gamekeeper, of course, who’s already there and conversing with the animals almost as if it were a causal, common occurrence. He was a tall man who loomed over not only the students but all of the staff, but still managed to have some of the kindest eyes Kara had seen. In an odd and distant sort of way, the man reminded her a little of Jeremiah.

He gives them a gruff sort of grin. Lena smiles in response, but Kara and Barry both beam at him. He seems a little taken aback by just how excited they are, but all of them are quickly distracted by another couple of students showing up, and class ends up starting a couple minutes later.

Their first lesson, in comparison to most of the things she’ll come to learn in the next five years of Care of Magical Creatures, turns out to be rather dull. The Gamekeeper teaches them about Flobberworms, of all things. Tiny, slithering things that survive on a diet of lettuce and don’t do much besides exist.

(Still, the first time he puts one of the little guys in her hands, she’s taken with it in some inexplicable way.

She loves it.)

-

She doesn’t quite realize it at first, but something between her and James has changed.

It starts with these glances they’ve been sharing. She doesn’t really understand it, but he looks at her in a different way then he used to. It reminds her a little of how she’d seen him look at Lucy, but he doesn’t seem to do that as much anymore. Now, it’s directed at her, and if she’s honest, she’s a little thrown. Not put off, but… a little confused, about both his feelings and her own.

If she’s honest, she kind of likes it. James is warm, and caring, and it makes her feel an odd sort of special when he looks at her the way he does.

“I think I’ve a crush on James,” she tells Lena one day, trying to make it sound as casual as possible. Lena looks down at her a raised eyebrow and a funny sort of grin.

“Oh? Do tell.”

“I dunno,” Kara replies, shifting from where she’s stretched out over Lena’s lap. “He’s brave and funny and he makes me laugh. He’s certainly handsome.”

“That’s all?”

Kara blinks, eyebrows furrowing together. “What do you mean, that’s all?”

There’s a lull before Lena speaks again. “I don’t know,” she says. “It’s just that usually when people talk about their crushes, they say things about how they get butterflies or their heart races. You get any of those?”

“I guess,” Kara answers, trying to shrug even though she’s laying on Lena’s stomach, which doesn’t quite work.. “Sometimes I see him and it makes my belly swoop, you know?”

“I know,” Lena replies. Kara doesn’t question it, but something in her pauses at that. Since when has Lena liked someone? Kara can’t ever recall the other girl even mentioning a past crush, and she’s positive that’s something she would remember. When she looks up at Lena’s face, though, there’s something odd in her expression, so she pushes it to the side and ignores it.

Besides, if Lena’s never told her, then it doesn’t matter anyway. If it did, Lena would have said something, she’s sure.

-

Even though she knew there was something shifting between her and James, she’d be lying if she said she still wasn’t a little caught off guard when he asked her out on a date.

He manages to seem both nervous and confident at the same time when he invites her to Hogsmeade. Something about it is endearing, and after she gets over blinking at him in shock, she nods her head several times, rather enthusiastically. He chuckles, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck before making plans to meet her outside the Hufflepuff common room that weekend before heading into the village.

Kara doesn’t hesitate before telling Alex as soon as she can. As soon as she can means later that day, Alex sneaking her into the Ravenclaw tower so they can curl up on her bed and talk.

Alex listens to her gush with a smile on her face, even if she follows it with copious amounts of teasing, throwing one of her pillows at the younger girl’s face. Kara catches it curls around it instead, sticking her tongue out at Alex in spite.

(In return, Kara manages to pry and pry until Alex starts to talk about Maggie. She’s a little hesitant at first, but once Kara gets her going, she talks for a while, before pushing to subject back onto James.)

Despite the fact that they’re in Alex’s dorm, not Kara’s, the blonde insists her sister has to help her pick something to wear. Alex rolls her eyes, because all of Kara’s clothes are in her own room, but still manages to make several suggestions based on what she knows Kara brought, or what the other girl mentions she has tucked away in her trunk.

Eventually, when curfew starts to get closer, Kara slips out of the Ravenclaw tower as fast as she can, trying to avoid drawing attention to herself due to the fact that it’s not actually her common room. The students that do see her seem to have just learned to ignore her, mostly due to the fact that her own sunny personality and Alex’s vaguely threatening one making telling on Kara just not worth it.

Barry’s reclining on one of the couches, textbook in his lap, but his attention is pulled when he looks up to see Kara walking in with a smile on her face. She starts to make her way over, and she tosses the book aside, knowing fully well he won’t really be doing anymore studying now that she’s here, and clearly with something to talk about, considering the way her lips are curling.

“James asked me out!” She blurts, dropping down onto the cushions beside him with a happy sort of noise.

Barry blinks once before smiling. “He did?”

“Yeah!” Kara all but chirps. “We’re going to Hogsmeade together this weekend!”

Barry pretends to pout, jutting his lower lip out. “Does that mean you aren’t going with us?”

For a second, Kara panics, before realizing he’s kidding. With a huff, she reaches over and shoves him into the arm of the couch while he laughs.

“I’m sure the three of you’ll survive,” she tells him. “You’ve got each other.”

“And now, only each other,” Barry whines dramatically, slapping a hand to his chest and pretending to fall back.

“Barry,” she protests, drawing the last syllable out. “You know I love you.”

“But you won’t love me anymore once you have a boyfriend!”

She groans. “Barry, please.”

“Tell my mother I love her,” he says. “Tell Lena she can have my Exploding Snap deck. Tell Winn he’s too shrimpy to fit in my robes and have me buried in them.”

“Oh, shut up!” Kara butts in. “You’re so exaggerating. And Winn is not shrimpy, he’s just shorter than you, and he wouldn’t have a use for Hufflepuff robes, anyway, you prat.”

“Uh-huh, uh-huh,” he mutters, sitting back up. “Shouldn’t you be preparing for your big date with Sir James tomorrow or something?”

“I forced Alex to help me pick something to wear already,” she explains. “But… I haven’t picked any shoes yet…”

Barry tips his head back and moans as Kara grabs his hand with a grin, pulling him to his feet. “Come on,” she urges him, dragging him behind her up to her room, him whining the whole way.

“But it’s the girls dorms!”

“You’ll live!”

(He complains, but he helps her pick out a pair of flats anyway.)

-

The next morning, James meets her outside her dorm and walks her to breakfast.

She’s surprised, but pleasantly so, hooking her arm through his with a grin. He returns it as they make their way down to the Great Hall together. When they get there, most everyone is already sat at the table eating. When they approach, Alex offers her a sly sort of smile, while Lena arches an eyebrow. Kara shrugs before sliding into her seat.

“What’s happening here?” Lucy asks, her voice teasing. She’s grinning at them, even if her brows are furrowed together in a confused sort of way, but by all appearances, she’s fine. Across the table, James and Kara make eye contact before he grins.

“We’re going on a date today,” he answers.

“Really?” Winn asks. His eyes are wide in shock while his mouth is full of cereal, and when he opens it to speak, a little bit of milk drips down his chin. “Finally?”

“What do you mean, finally?” James questions.

“You guys are so not subtle.” Alex adds, smirking at the red that fills her sister’s cheeks. “Like, really not subtle.”

“I don’t-” Kara sputters, but both Alex and Barry turn to give her matching, skeptical looks, and she ducks her head and tries to fight the blush warming her face and neck.

They make jokes for the rest of the meal. They being Alex, Barry, and Lucy. Maggie seems oddly quiet, as does Lena, but they both quickly get involved debating the merits of Quidditch with Winn, who argues that the game is engineered to favor glory for the seeker rather than the rest of the team.

Once they’ve finished eating, Barry, Lena, and Winn all say goodbye before heading out to Hogsmeade, trying to beat most of the rush out of the Castle. Not too long afterwards, Kara and James excuse themselves and leave for town, Kara buzzing with excitement as they leave hand and hand.

(By the end of the day, he asks her to be his girlfriend.

She bounces on the balls of her feet when she says yes, and she kisses him on the cheek once before rushing off back towards the Hufflepuff dorms with a smile on her face.)

-

(Kara and James fall into a relationship as if were an extension of their friendship, and nothing much changes.

Except.

Lena leaves dinner early one night with a weird look on her face, jumping up and disappearing with a clipped explanation. Kara watches her go with furrowed brows, and when she looks back to the table, Maggie’s wearing a similar expression.

She lets it go, though, and it’s mostly slipped her mind by the next morning, where Lena misses breakfast and lunch. Barry also mentions that she wasn’t at their Muggle Studies class, and Kara’s so caught up in being concerned for her friend that last night won’t even seem important to think about.

She’s back by dinner, though, and Kara throws her arms around her within seconds of seeing her. “I was worried,” she tells her. “I mean, you’ve never missed class, and-”

“I’m fine,” Lena says, interrupting her before she can start ranting. “I had a headache, I just slept it off.”)

-

Being with James is nice.

Just… nice. When she thinks about it, there’s no other real word that works better than plain old nice. It’s comforting, and safe, but mostly, it’s just nice.

And she thinks for a long time that’s fine. That it’s how she supposed to feel. She’s content with the way James’ hand is warm in hers, the way he smiles when she leans up on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. She’s happy.

She’s happy, really, except sometimes she catches James looking at Lucy out of the corner of his eye, except she still wants that fairytale feeling of being weightless when he kisses her.

(But those are just stories, right? That isn’t how it works in real life.)

That’s what she thinks, anyway, up until Alex starts dating Maggie. She’d known her sister had a crush on the Gryffindor, has heard Alex giggle about Maggie with a pillow clutched to her chest like a muggle television school girl. She’d thought it was just how you acted when you had a crush on someone, like how she was before she started dating James, figured it was just something that would die down once they got together.

She didn’t expect it to get worse. And yet?

Alex’s grin whenever she talks about Maggie manages to be more giddy than ever before. It puzzles Kara, just a little bit, but when she voices that out loud, Alex gives her an odd look.  
“Is that not how you feel with James?”

“I mean, not really,” Kara answers. “It’s just… nice.”

“Nice?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Alex looks at her with something like concern, and Kara brushes it off, prompting Alex to talk more about Maggie. It takes some coaxing to get her sister to shift topics, but once she manages to get her sidetracked, Alex falls back into talking about her girlfriend like she never stopped.

Kara listens, and part of it makes her want. She wants to feel about someone the way her sister feels about Maggie, wants to have butterflies in her stomach, wants to be unable to stop smiling. She wants to look at someone the way Alex looks at her girlfriend, wants to be looked at the same way in return. And if she’s being honest, she thinks sometimes James looks at Lucy like that more than he does her.

(She breaks up with James the next time she sees him, and she should feel something, but she really doesn’t.)

-

Kara tells Lena about her break-up and Lena comes out as gay all within a couple of minutes. Lena looks at her like she’s afraid her being a lesbian is going to change their friendship, like Kara’s going to turn her away. It stings a little bit, but it makes her ache even more for Lena, who’s grown to expect and accept the worst from people.

“It’s not like this changes anything,” she assures the other girl. “You’re still my best friend and I love you. But I’m glad you told me.”

Lena exhales, shaky, as murmurs her thanks, and Kara pulls her into a hug. When they pull away, Kara’s quick to change the subject, and manages to weasel Lena’s address out of her. She doesn’t particularly like to dwell on it, but she remembers the way they parted on the train last year, the almost cornered look on Lena’s face before she all but ran away.

She promises the Slytherin that they’re going to write this summer, as much as they can. Kara’s likely to wear out the family owl with the rate she writes letters, but Linda has been flying strong for years and she’s certain to have many more in her yet.  
When she says this, Lena laughs, before something thoughtful overtakes her face. Kara pauses, and when she looks down, something glints in her eyes.

“Have you ever been down to the lake?”

“Once or twice,” Kara answers. “Why?”

“Has anybody ever taught you how to skip rocks?”

Kara blinks, eyebrows furrowing, and Lena grins, climbing to her feet and pulling the blonde up with her. Confused by the other girl’s sudden shift, Kara allows herself to be dragged.

“I’m teaching you,” Lena insists.

“To skip rocks? What’s… that?”

“If you throw rocks the right way, you can make them bounce off the water,” Lena explains.

“With magic?” Kara asks.

The brunette shakes her head with a soft laugh. “No, with your hands,” she replies. “It’s kind of a muggle thing. Lex taught me how.”

(Kara all but whirls. Lena never smiles like this when she talks about her brother.)

They make their way down to the lake, Lena still trying to tell her all about how to make the rocks skip. Kara’s a little skeptical, because in her experience, inanimate objects don’t tend to jump without the help of magic, but Lena seems to be excited, so she’s willing to go along with it. Once they get down to the edge of the water, the other girl glances around to inspect the various pebbles scattered about, until she grabs a couple ones that seem smoother than the others, pressing one into Kara’s hand.

“You have to use the flattest ones you can find,” she says. “That way they bounce farther.”

Kara turns the rock in her hand over a couple times, inspecting it. “How do I make it jump?”

“You throw it,” Lena answers. Kara nods, and before the brunette can say anything to stop her, she chucks it out into the lake. To her disappointment, it hits the water and sinks right down to the bottom with a splash, out of sight, and she turns to Lena with a disheartened look.

“It didn’t work,” she tells her, as if they both didn’t just witness what happened.

“I noticed,” Lena assures her. “You didn’t let me finish. You have to throw it the right way.”

She pulls her arm back with a stone in hand, exaggerating her movements for the purpose of demonstration, before tossing it out over the lake. It hits the water and skips off once or twice before going in. Kara blinks, tilting her head.

“You just… do it like that?” She ask.

Lena nods. “Just like that.”

“Huh,” Kara hums. Lena passes her another rock, and after a moment, she takes it. Trying to mimic the exact way Lena had done it, she turns her body and flings the pebble. When it, again, plunges into the surface and doesn’t come back up, she pouts.

“That was better,” Lena assures her. Kara turns to her, and she smiles in response, nudging the other girl with her elbow. “Try again.”

A little hesitant, Kara pauses before taking another rock from Lena’s palm. After a little bit more encouragement from the brunette, she flicks the stone out over the water. This time, it bounces once before sinking, and Kara lights up, eyes going wide.

“I did it!” She cheers.

“You did it,” Lena agrees, laughing as she’s drawn into a hug. When Kara pulls back, the other girl is beaming up at her, one of the biggest and most genuine smiles she’s even seen from Lena, and it makes her chest warm.

-

(The end of the year seems to quick after that, and with it, it brings test upon test to be studied for.

Lena overworks herself to exhaustion for her exams, to the point that, not only does she fall asleep and slump over into Alex’s lap, but she naps there for two hours.

Kara wants to make fun of her, she really does, but she’s also concerned. Plus, she passes out not too long after, cuddling with a textbook of all things.

She thinks the best part is the disgruntled look Lena wears the next morning, because Maggie employed Leslie Willis to take all of Lena’s books hostage in the name of her finally getting some sleep, and even if she’s annoyed about it, the dark circles starting to form underneath her eyes look a little less present.)

-

Everyone, of course, passes their exams. The most relieved of them all is Lena who, considering how crazy smart she is, has been far too worried about failing. She won’t say it, but Kara suspects it has something to do with her mother, the intense pressure the woman seems to be putting on Lena at all times.

After exams are done, they only have a couple more days left before they head home. For the last few days, everyone is relaxed and warm, smiling with little abandon and trying to soak up the last bits of time they have with each other until the next year at Hogwarts rolls around and brings them all back to school and back together.

They’ve all, in the past three years, grown into such a comfortable sense of friendship. Everyone’s grown accustomed to Kara’s spontaneous hugs, Lucy’s consistent teasing, and Winn’s rants on things most of them don’t even understand. Alex has taken the role of group big sister with little hesitation, teasing James and Winn about girls and praising Lena for her accomplishments like she’s been doing it for years upon years. Maggie too, to a certain extent.

(Maggie and Kara may not be all that close, compared to everyone else, but Maggie makes Lena smile and Alex light up, and really, all Kara wants for the two of them is to be happy.)

Their last train ride of the year, Kara sits content next the window, Lena beside her in the seat with her feet tucked under her legs. Barry and Winn sit across from them, stretching out as much as they can in the tiny compartment, trying to get comfortable.

Even among the rest of their friends, they’ve managed to cement themselves together. The four of them, in three years, have managed to become each other’s best friends. Barry will go on any adventure with Kara if she asks, will help Winn with anything. Lena will listen to Kara ramble about whatever she wants, can actually understand most of the things Winn talks about. Winn, as awkward as he may be sometimes, is always there for them in a pinch, coming up with exaggerated ways to get them out of it.

Kara looks around the cabin and she loves them all.

(She doesn’t seem to notice the way Winn and Lena can’t help but glance at her when she isn’t paying attention, but then again, neither of those things are all that important to Kara then.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone remind me to release a scene with lena, barry, and winn hanging out together in hogsmeade while kara was on a date with james


	4. jumped across for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara finds herself, for the first time, trapped between her best friend and her boyfriend.
> 
> or, Lena and Kara fight, I use Mike as a scapegoat, and we meet the best Quidditch captain who ever lived

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, writing made of starlight: it seems like a good choice to have kara date mike right here  
> me now, writing this fic: i have to write kara??? being in love with mike?? but he sucks?? but he also has to be charming, because she’s actively dating him????  
> this is a longer one, y’all

Kara spends her summer hanging out with Alex, like usual.

Only this time, she gets to see her friends. Lucy’s over constantly, which isn’t much of a change, to be honest. The youngest Lane sister has been Alex’s best friend before they started at Hogwarts, but ever since the summer after their first year, Lucy spends as much time at their house as she does at her own. But now, James is showing up with her, quieter than Lucy but still just a present.

Despite what happened between him and Kara, things between them are much like they were before their attempt at a relationship. It’s almost like it never happened, except for the occasion awkward moments Kara manages to stumble in, because of course, she’s Kara.

Barry comes over a couple times, too. She takes him around the town she lives in, shows him all the fun sorts of things she and Alex like to do over the summer. It’s different for him, having spent his whole life growing up in a wizard town. A muggle community makes for a little bit of culture shock for him, but he still enjoys the time he spends at Kara’s all the same. Winn even gets to come over a couple times, but that’s more about getting to spend time with his friends than anything else, having grown up in another muggle city.

She even gets to write to Lena this summer. It’s an amazing sort of new. She’s grown so used to the other girl disappearing from her life for three months that being able to send her letters and get them in return is a change. It makes her miss Lena a little less than she used to.

At the end of vacation, Eliza drops her and Alex off at the train station, kissing them both on the forehead and wrapping them in tight hugs before nudging them towards the train. She makes them both promise to write letters, and the last thing Kara sees of the platform is Eliza smiling at them with bright, warm eyes.

(It’s a good summer.)

-

Her new potions partner is Mike, a Gryffindor from their year.

He’s… charming, that’s for certain. He smiles at her with a wide grin and white teeth when they sit down at their shared desk. He’s cute, and funny in an almost dopey sort of way.

He asks her out a little more than a month into the school year, and she tries her best to turn him down in the nicest way possible, because yeah, she kinda likes him, but she barely knows him. Besides, if they break up, she’ll still have to be his potions partner for the rest of the semester, maybe the year, and that would be… awkward.

When she tells Lena, the other girl acts a little weird, but that seems about it. He doesn’t really ever come back up in conversation, so Kara doesn’t have another opportunity to gauge Lena’s reaction.

Just because they don’t really talk about him, though, doesn’t mean he doesn’t exist. Mike continues to be an attractive mix of likeable and humorous, and in class, their interactions slowly take on a more and more flirtatious tone.

When he asks her out the second time, she says yes on an impulse.

He grins at her, wide and almost devilish, when she says yes. It’s yet another impulse that she acts on when she leans up onto the tips of her toes and presses a kiss to his cheek.

She’s doing exactly that a day later when Lena sees it. He smiles at her before disappearing into his classroom, and when she turns around, Lena is standing there, staring at her with something almost blank in her eyes. She knows that look, knows it well. Lena’s hurt.

And Kara feels bad. Of course she does. She hates to see that look on Lena’s face, hates to know that she’s the one who caused it. She’s all set to apologize for not saying anything, even if it’s only been a day.

That is, until she makes her way over and Lena jumps out of the gate irritated. “Since when have you been interested in Mike?” She all but demands, and the blonde flinches, just a bit.  
Right away, Kara feels like she’s on guard. Something about it feels like an attack, like she’s being punished for doing something wrong, but there’s nothing for her to be punished for.

“He asked me out,” she answers. “I mean, what’s the harm?”

“Yeah, like three weeks ago, and you said you turned him down,” Lena points out.

“Yeah, but he asked me out again yesterday, I said yes this time.”

Lena crosses her arms over her chest. “So he asks you out a second time and you say yes, just like that? Do you even like him?”

“He seems nice enough,” Kara replies with a frown. She thinks Lena might catch the way she’s starting to get annoyed, because Mike gets dropped from the conversation, but even if they don’t talk about him, the tension still lingers.

-

Between her new relationship with Mike and… whatever’s going on with Lena, her first Quidditch practice sneaks up on her and catches her completely off guard.

Still, when she finds herself standing out beside Barry on the pitch, clutching a broomstick in her hand, she still feels that excitement buzzing in her bones, underneath her skin.

Their captain, a grinning sixth-year boy named Tommy who likes to make jokes about his last name, holds a broomstick in each hand. His lips curl when he takes a survey of his team lined up before him, eyes falling on the two new youngest members of his team. Kara and Barry both straighten under his gaze, standing a little taller, eyes widening just a bit.

“Allen, Danvers,” he greets, and his face manages to maintain a serious face for two seconds before it splits in a smile. He tosses a broomstick to each of them, both of them just managing to catch it on instinct. “Consider these a welcome present to the team.” 

Kara and Barry both look up at him with comically shocked expressions on their faces. “They’re Nimbuses,” Tommy continues. “Not the newest models, but they’re fast, and they run well.”

The entire rest of their team, for their parts, doesn’t seem at all shocked. Kara takes a moment to realize that almost every other person on the team has their own Nimbus in hand. Barry is still glancing around like he’s expecting a prank, but Kara turns back to Tommy, who’s looking incredibly amused at the two of them.

“My family has a lot of money,” he assures them. “And I want my team to be doing their best. Part of that is preparation.”

“So you’re just… giving us brooms?” Barry asks.

“You’re part of my team now,” Tommy says simply, as if the answer is as easy at that.

(Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t, but Kara decides she doesn’t need more of an explanation once she takes off for the first time and feels just how fast the Nimbus can go.)

-

Everything between Lena and Mike comes to a head soon after he starts sitting with him.

Right away, Lena starts acting different, a little wary. To a certain point, Alex does as well, but not nearly to the extent that Lena does. She gets quieter, starts to spend a little less time with Kara, especially whenever Mike may be involved.

(Kara doesn’t mention it, and for the most part she ignores it, but this is when she starts to notice the small bruises that dot Lena’s collar, red marks she can see whenever the other girl scratches at her neck.)

In hindsight. Kara doesn’t do anything to help, really, doesn’t do anything to try and resolve the situation. Instead, she just kind of watches it all fester, until one day she actually manages to ask Lena what she thinks of Mike, and it goes wrong from there.

Looking back, Kara won’t really remember how it turned into a fight. One second they’re talking, and the next Lena’s arms are crossed and her jaw is set and her words are biting. Kara tries to stay calm at first, but when Lena pushes it a little too far, she snaps back, and it goes south from there. Soon, Lena’s storming off and leaving Kara alone in the hallway with watering eyes, frozen in place.

She stands there for what feels like a long while before she can manage to move her feet again. She’s supposed to be heading to her charms class in a few minutes, but instead, she turns on her heels and heads for the courtyard instead. Alex is supposed to be there with Maggie, and while she would normally feel bad about barging in on their time, she doesn’t know what else to do.

She feels a little better the moment she steps outside, warm sunlight washing over her. Alex catches sight of her in only seconds, jumping to her feet when she sees the look on Kara’s face, Maggie scrambling to stand beside her.

“Kara?” Alex asks. “What’s wrong?”

“Lena and I got in a fight,” she answers, closing the distance between them and allowing Alex to pull her into a hug. The other girl hums something under her breath and skims her fingers over Kara’s back in an attempt to comfort her. After a moment of hesitation, Maggie places her hand on the blonde’s shoulder, thumb rubbing circles into her collarbone, and Kara leans into the touch.

“What happened?” Alex asks.

“She doesn’t like Mike.”

“You got in a fight because Lena doesn’t like Mike?”

“I- _yes_ ,” Kara mumbles. “I don’t- It just- It happened so quick, and- I don’t know.”

There’s a pause before Alex speaks. “Everything’s going to be okay, Kara,” she assures. “It seems… it seems bad now, but things are going to be okay with you too. You’re Kara and Lena, you’ll get past this.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

(Lena skips their Care of Magical Creatures class. Then, she starts missing meals, and avoiding Kara all together.)

The next time she’s out in the courtyard, it’s two or three days afterwards. She goes alone, takes a textbook and perches herself on the wall to study. It’s completely empty out, especially on such a nice day, and if it weren’t for the noise of the birds in the trees, it would be eerily silent.

She’s less than half an hour into studying when Lena steps outside. Kara’s so engrossed in her textbook that she doesn’t register the footsteps approaching her until she can see the toes of Lena’s shoes in front of her. When she looks up, the brunette is standing only a foot or two away, looking somewhere between nervous and sheepish.

“Hi,” she murmurs.

Kara blinks, a little stunned, slowly standing up. “I thought- don’t have you have a class right now?”

Lena nods. “I do,” she replies. “But this- _you’re_ more important.”

“It doesn’t feel that way when you’re avoiding me,” Kara says, unable to stop herself. Lena winces, and it makes her feel a little bad, but that doesn’t change the fact that what she said is true.

“I’m sorry, I know it wasn’t fair,” Lena apologizes. For a minute, it looks like she’s going to say something else, but falls silent, mouth all but snapping closed.

When it becomes clear that she’s not going to finish the thought, Kara sighs. 

“I- Lena, you can’t do _that_ ,” she tells her. “You can’t just avoid me when you’re upset about something, that’s not- that’s not how friendship works.”

“I know, Kara, I’m so sorry,” Lena tries, but Kara keeps going, cutting her off..

“You’re my best friend, Lena, but this whole thing with Mike is- I just… I feel like I can’t love him and you at the same time.”

Lena takes a small step back, almost like a stumble, and her eyes are wide. “You love him?”

Just like that, Kara feels her shoulders slump, and she’s _tired_. “I don’t know,” the blonde admits, one of her hands coming up to pull at her hair. “I just, my feelings are so confusing, and I feel like I’m bottling them up because I can’t _talk to you about them_ , but you’re my best friend, Lena! This is the kind of stuff I want to be telling you about because I’m so confused-”

Lena interrupts her by wrapping a hand around her wrist and, after a moment, pulls her into a hug. Kara hesitates for only a second before melting into her arms. Lena murmurs a quiet apology, and Kara squeezes a little harder, pressing her face into the other girl’s neck.

“It’s okay,” Kara mumbles. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Lena echoes, and it feels important.

-

When Kara finds out Lena’s staying at Hogwarts for the holiday break, she acts on her first instinct and invites her to come back to her house. Lena says no, of course, but Kara jumps quickly onto her next idea, and insists on staying at school with Lena for Christmas.

Lena’s face twists into what looks like shock and horror, and quickly starts to try and convince Kara of why that’s not a good idea. Kara’s persistent, though, and now that she’s got her mind set to the idea of staying at the castle for break, Lena’s having a hard time trying to convince her otherwise when Maggie speaks up.

“Lena won’t be staying at school alone,” she tells them. “I’m staying, too”

Kara doesn’t know why, but her sister’s face twists into a sad frown for a moment, before jumps into the conversation.

“I’m staying at school,” she announces, prompting everyone to turn to her in surprise.

“Um, why is everyone trying to spend Christmas at Hogwarts this year?” Winn asks. “Is there something going on that nobody’s telling me about?”

“No,” Kara answers. “We just don’t want you guys to be alone. We can both stay with you.”

“What about your mom?” Lena asks.

“What about her?”

“You can’t just abandon your mom on Christmas,” Maggie points out. “It’s Christmas, she’ll be all alone.”

“She’s right,” Alex realizes, and there’s a long moment where both of the sisters stare at each other in silence, sizing each other up, before they both lunge at the same time, standing up and leaning over the table, laying both hands flat against the wood with their faces barely more than a foot apart.

“I’m staying!” They both shout.

“Maggie’s my girlfriend,” Alex argues.

“Lena’s my best friend,” Kara retorts.

“So?”

Kara opens her mouth to respond, but her mind stumbles, and she snaps her jaw shut as she glares at Alex. “Well, I said I was going to stay first,” she says.

Alex glances down at the watch on her wrist when it dings, and with a scowl, she turns back to her sister. “I don’t have time to fight over this, I have to get to Charms,” she replies. “But I’m definitely staying, and you’re going home.”

Alex turns to walk away, leaving the rest of her friends sat at the table, Kara steaming in her wake. “You are _not_ ,” she shouts at her sister’s retreating form, but Alex doesn’t give any indication of hearing her. Nostrils flared, she sinks back into her seat, arms folded across her chest, and Mike reaches out to rub her on the shoulder, almost condescendingly. There’s a little voice in her head that tells her to shrug it off, but she ignores it, leaning into his touch instead.

The argument comes back around at dinner, and when they start in on it, Maggie tips her head back and groans. They ignore her, for the most part, until they really start to get into it, and Maggie cuts them both off.

“You two are insufferable,” she tells them. Both of the Danvers sisters turn to her with wide eyes, and she just stares back. “It’s not fair if either of you stay. Besides, Christmas back at home won’t be the same without both of you there. You’ll both miss each other, and your mom will miss whoever’s still at Hogwarts. You’re both going home, yeah?”

Alex and Kara stare at each other for a long moment before they both deflate. “Yeah,” they reply, almost completely in sync, and Maggie sighs in relief.

“Thank you,” she says, reaching for a roll from the center of the table. “Now I can finally have some peace.”

“Maggie, they’ve been arguing for less than a day-” Lucy points out, but she’s interrupted by Maggie shushing her.

“Peace,” she repeats, biting off a piece of her food.

Across the table, Alex and Kara make eye contact for a few seconds before bursting out into laughter, and just like that, all arguments are forgotten.

-

The second game Hufflepuff goes against Gryffindor since Kara’s started dating Mike, her team wins. And not by a little, either. They’re already sixty points ahead when Barry manages to pluck the snitch out of the air, making the final score 240-30.

The night after the game, the entire team celebrates. It’s especially exciting, because the last time they went toe to toe with Gryffindor, they lost by twenty points a three-hour game, most of which was played in a dismal rain, so beating them by so much the second time around is a victory. Tommy parades her and Barry around the party, his two youngest, newest players, working in tandem to catch the snitch and block almost all of the opposing team’s shots. His two fourth years, all but winning them the game.

She spends the night bouncing around between different members of her house. People she’s barely spoken to know her name, smile when they talk to her, and it makes her feel important.

The next day, however, Mike is acting… off. He’s distracted at breakfast, brushes her off afterward. It stings, but she lets it go, decides to give him some time.

At lunch, however, it’s exactly the same. This time, she’s not the only one who notices, if Alex and Lena’s reactions are anything to go by. Her sister’s jaw is set in a hard line, eyebrows stitching together just the slightest bit in irritation. Lena’s face is unreadable, but her eyes narrow just the slightest bit in a mix of anger and... something else.

Afterwards, she catches him before he manages to head back to his dorms, wrapping a hand around is bicep. He looks a little annoyed at her for stopping him, but he stalls in place anyway.

“Is something wrong?” She asks.

He gives her a blank look, his eyebrows folding down over his eyes. “What?”

“You seem upset,” She adds.

“I’m not.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m _not_ ,” he insists, but the way his voice is starting to rise in frustration makes it ring a bit hollow. When she gives him a concerned look, he scoffs, turning away. “Figures you’re out to make me look bad again.”  
She blinks at him, confused, before it dawns on her.

“Are you… mad at me… because we beat you last night?

“I’m just saying, you didn’t have to play so hard-” he starts, but irritation starts to bubble in her throat as she cuts him off.

“You’re just saying what?” She replies. “That I shouldn’t have played my hardest because I was playing against you? Are you saying- are you saying that I should’ve let you win?”

“No!” Mike answers, but his fingers are starting to curl into his palm as his frustration grows. “Not that you should’ve let me win, just- you didn’t have to beat us by so much! You were already going to win, you didn’t have to make us look so _bad_ -”

“It’s not about making you look bad,” she argues. “It’s about playing for my team, about playing the game. It’s about putting everything I am into the sport, doing the best I can!”

He goes silent, an unreadable look on his face. After a moment, she sighs.

“Look, I’m sorry,” she says, and wait, _why is she apologizing?_

“I’m sorry, too,” he echoes. “I just… I get so frustrated. Sometimes, it feels like you’re way better than me. You beat me at things, and your friends act like I’m not as good as you-”

Something in Kara melts a little at that. “Hey,” she interrupts. “What my friends think of you doesn’t matter. What matters is how I think about you.”

She reaches up to wind her arms around his neck, and his expression softens a little bit at the touch. “They aren’t the ones dating you, I am,” she murmurs. “And I think you’re great.”

He leans in, until his breath washes over her lips when he speaks. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

(After that, though, he starts acting odd, and even though she does her best to ignore it, she can’t help but feel… off about the whole thing.)

-

(Kara feels a little bad about leaving Lena and Maggie at the school over the holidays. Mike is staying, too, but he acts a lot more cavalier about it, as if it doesn’t really matter, claiming he doesn’t want to go back home anyway.

She manages to have a good holiday, anyway. Alex stuffs her full of chocolate while Eliza does her best to spoil them both, and she goes back to school smiling and happy.

Lena greets her with odd, lopsided smile, almost as if she’s forcing it, and something about it is weird.)

-

She’s barely back at school when she finds herself back in the courtyard, surrounded by Lena, Maggie, and Alex. They’re all gathered together, talking softly, but when they see her, they break apart. Lena shifts a little where she stands, like she’s nervous, and it makes Kara feel on edge within moments.

“Hey guys,” she greets, trying to her best to sound cheery even though all three girls are wearing matching looks that all seem rather… grim, like they’re about to bear bad news. “What’s up?”

Maggie and Lena share an odd glance, before the latter swallows, turning to Kara. “There’s something we need to talk to you about,” she tells her, and then falters, as if she didn’t mean to say it so suddenly. “It’s, um…”

“What’s wrong?” Kara prompts.

“Listen Kara,” Maggie says. “Lena and I stayed here over the break, and um, while we were here, we saw Mike.”

When she doesn’t follow it up with anything, Kara jumps in. “And?”

“...He was making about with another girl,” Lena finishes.

For one, long moment, nobody says anything. Alex, who’s been standing there in silence until now, tries to reach out and touch Kara’s shoulder, but she shakes her off, leaving without speaking another word. She can see Lena trying to follow her out of the corner of her eye, but nobody comes after her.

She doesn’t wait, or put it off. She knows exactly where Mike is, ‘studying’ with some of his friends in the library. Without a second thought, she storms in there, uncaring of who sees it. (She’s not an angry person, not by nature, but after this? It feels warranted.) He looks up at her, brows furrowed, and she all but drags him out into the hall, leaving his friends still sat at their table and staring after them in shock.

The second they’re alone, she whirls around him. “Did you cheat on me?” She demands. Almost instantly, his face goes pale, blood drained out of it.

“What?”

“Did you make out with another girl while I was gone on holiday?” She asks.

He pauses, and she can see it in his face when he does, even if he says otherwise. “I didn’t-”

“It’s true” Kara shouts. “Oh my god, it is!”

She turns away, stuffing her fist in her mouth and biting down on her knuckle. He reaches out to lay a hand on her shoulder, but she throws herself out of his reach, furious.

“Don’t touch me,” she spits. “Don’t touch me ever again.”

“Kara-”

“This is over,” she hisses, fingers curling into fists at her side. “Everything between us is over. Never touch me again.”

Her nails dig into her palms as she turns on her heels and stalks away, trying to push down the angry tears welling up in her eyes with every step she takes.

(Their next potions class, their professor announces they’ll be getting new partners for the second semester. Kara, from where she’s standing beside Mike, deflates in relief. He glowers, eyebrows knitting together in what appears to be irritation, but she really doesn’t care much.

While most of the class is distracted by gathering their stuff and moving to their new assigned seats, Professor M’orzz catches her eye and nods, small and private, and Kara’s so grateful she nearly cries.)

-

(She gets over Mike.

It’s better and worse than she’s expected. All-in-all, her day to day life doesn’t change much. She spends more time with her friends, a little more time on studying.

She misses him, sure, but she heals, moves on. Lena and Barry are there with shoulders to lean on, and Alex never fails to point out different ways that Kara’s better off without him.

Besides, she thinks, if he cheated on her so easily, then it’s no big loss anyway.)

-

Lena comes to all her Quidditch matches, without fail.

If she’s honest, a little piece of Kara thinks it’s because the other girl still feels guilty for missing her first match, but by now, she’s long gotten over it. Now, she’s just happy to have Lena at all her games, camped out in the Hufflepuff stands no matter who’s playing.

(This match shouldn’t be any different. It really shouldn’t, and yet somehow, the scarf changes it all.)

On the day of one particular match, Kara’s a little more chipper than usual. She bounces around during their early morning practice, smiles through breakfast and lunch with her friends. And before the game, she stops to pull out her scarf and wrap it around Lena’s neck, the Hufflepuff yellow standing out against Slytherin green. Players have begun to line up along the pitch, so she grins at Lena one last time before running down the stairs to the field.

“You’re late,” Barry teases once she hits the grass, despite the fact that she still has a couple minutes to spare. She sticks her tongue out at him with a mocking noise, and he throws his glove at her in retaliation, laughing despite himself.

They play well, really well. Kara only lets two goals get past her (half that of the other team’s keeper), and Barry catches the snitch fairly early, ending the game within 45 minutes with a score of 20-190. 

After the whistle’s blown, she lands gently, touching down nice and easy. Less than a few seconds after her feet touch the ground, however, Barry is bowling into her, tackling her in a hug that nearly sends them both in the grass. The snitch is still trapped in his fist, and she can feel his hand buzzing around it when his arms wrap around her back.

Tommy claps them both on the shoulder, hooting and hollering. The rest of their team is cheering alongside them, mostly due to the fact that winning this game put them in competition for winning the Quidditch Cup.

By the time the excitement’s died down and Kara’s managed to change and head out of the locker room, Lena’s already waiting for her, scarf still wound around her neck. Kara speeds her way over, still grinning, and takes the ends in her hands, using them to tug Lena closer. The other girl’s eyes go a little wide with something akin to shock, and she huffs out a little breath right across Kara’s lips.

And then it registers, with Lena standing there in the sunlight wearing her scarf and smiling at her, their faces less than a foot apart, that she really wants to kiss her.

And really, this revelation should be shattering, earth-stopping, jaw-dropping shock. Instead, it feels like something clicking into place, something she ought to have known by now. Something that, somehow, she managed to miss.

(But Lena’s still staring at her, waiting for Kara to finish her sentence. She smiles, big and bright because she feels so _full_ , and tells Lena she looks nice in yellow.)

-

She tries her best to get Lena to come home with her this summer, like she usually does. And, as always, Lena says no, her face a sad mix of regret and resignation. Kara accepts it, of course, because she understands. Still, it stings a little, because she was hoping to try and get everyone to her house this time. Barry and Winn’ll both be there, as will Lucy and James, so for the most part, it’ll be a full house. They’re just missing Lena.

(Sometimes though, Lena looks at her and she feels like she’s going to combust, so maybe it’s a good thing.)

Still, she manages to be excited when they get on the train, and the whole way home. She’s quick to point out Eliza to Barry and Winn when they pull into the station, and both boys look out the window to see who she’s talking about as she turns to Lena.

“I’m sorry you can’t come,” she says, squeezing her hand. “I’ll miss you.”

Lena’s returning smile is bitter, and she pulls Kara into a hug that the blonde returns easily. After a few seconds, Lena tries to let go, but Kara holds on a little tighter.

Lena laughs into her shoulder. “You have to let me go eventually.”

When Kara finally relents and releases her, Lena moves to hug Barry and Winn before grabbing her luggage. A little part of Kara tells her to reach out and pull the other girl into her arms again, but she holds back. Lena smiles at them all before disappearing, stepping out of the compartment and heading up the hallway. For a moment or two after she walks away, everything is silent, before it hits Kara again that Barry and Winn are still coming home with her.

“Come on, guys,” she urges. “Get your stuff!”

They give her grins as they hurry to grab their luggage, nearly tripping over each other in the process. Once they’ve gotten themselves together, Kara bounces on her feet a couple times before leading them off the train. Ahead of them, she catches sight of Alex, Maggie, and Lucy, and she picks up her pace to fall into step behind them.

Eliza looks a little surprised when she sees all the children coming towards her at once. To her credit, though, she handles it like a pro, hugging both of her own before Lucy, and then greeting Maggie. Alex starts to turn red when her mother begins telling the Gryffindor just how much she’s heard about her, and by the end, the redhead is all but pleading for her to stop. With a smile, she turns to Barry and Winn, who both straighten just the slightest bit under her gaze.

“I’m Barry Allen,” the taller boy introduces himself, sticking a hand out towards Eliza, and she shakes it with an amused smile.

“That must make you Winn, then,” she says, turning to the aforementioned boy, who hesitates before nodding, squeaks out a greeting that sounds almost formal, calling her Ms. Danvers.

“You can just call me Eliza,” she assures him. “Ms. Danvers makes me sound old. Maybe as old as I am, but older than I’d care to think about.”

Alex snorts, but Kara only grins, bouncing forward to hug the woman again. “It’s so good to see you again, dear,” Eliza says, wrapping Kara in a tight hug. “You’re just about as tall as me, now.”

Stepping back, she takes a look at the six teenagers standing in front of her, and laughs.

“I’m glad the trunk is enchanted.”

“Which trunk?” Barry asks, eyebrows furrowed.

“The trunk of the van,” Eliza answers, and his eyes go a little wide.

“Barry isn’t very familiar with cars,” Kara adds

“We’re going to be riding in a car?” Barry asks. To his credit, Maggie also looks a little excited.

“We are,” Alex confirms, as they start to walk out to the heavily discussed minivan. “And, just so we’re clear, I call shotgun.”

“Alex!” Kara protests, her voice rising half an octave, only receiving a smirk in response.

“What’s shotgun?” Winn asks, and Kara pouts.

“It means Alex sits in the very front,” she explains. “Because she doesn’t love us, and thinks she’s too cool to sit in the back with her friends, sister, and girlfriend.”

“Oh, okay,” Maggie says, pretending to be offended. “I see how it is, Alex.”

“That’s okay, Maggie,” Lucy butts in. “I’ll sit in the back with you-”

“You don’t have a choice-” Alex tries, but Lucy cuts her off by speaking over her.

“Because _I_ love and appreciate you!”

“Thank you, Lucy,” Maggie says, smirking at Alex when she huffs. By now, they’ve already made it out to the minivan, and both the Danvers girls have started to help their mom load up the trunk, brushing off any offers of help. Even though it seems small, the three of them just keep shoving luggage in as if it will fit, and it does. Each suitcase or bag simply sinks in like there’s room. Once everything’s inside and the trunk is closed, they all pile into the seats.

Barry’s never been in a car before, save for a handful of times, so he looks around in awe at Eliza’s minivan as Lucy nudges him forward.

“It’s got a lot of seats,” he says. “I didn’t realize cars could have these many seats.”

Winn laughs, head tipped back, as he sits down buckles his seatbelt. Barry glances over at him before realizing that he’s supposed to wear one, too, and he fumbles around to find his before clicking it into place. The last to get in, Kara plunks herself down between the two.

“Are you all set back there?” Eliza asks, and is met with a resounding yes from Kara, and a quieter one from Alex, who caved to sit in the middle with Maggie, giving up the front seat to Lucy. With a faint chuckle, Eliza takes the car out of park, glancing at them all in the rearview.

“You guys ready for summer?” She asks.

Kara turns to look at Barry and Winn beside her, Alex and Maggie holding hands across the aisle in the middle seats, at Lucy dancing in the passenger seat because Eliza gave her control of the music. She grins.

“Yeah,” she says. “We’re ready.”

(They are.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did i write this chapter, realize that i made several mistakes about the way quidditch works in canon, and then decide to go with it anyway? yes.  
> also, tommy is Best Boy and i will fight about this


	5. how they shine for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secrets spill and Kara has to decide whether or not to go after what she wants.   
> ( and she does. of course she does. )
> 
> Or, Lena and Kara are super gay, and Tommy is still the best

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my biggest mood is how quickly kara goes from 0 to 100

Writing to Lena is great, but nothing really compares to seeing her in person.

When she pops up in the doorway of their compartment, Kara’s on her feet before anybody can blink, throwing her arms around Lena, pressing her nose into the top of the other girl’s head. Lena laughs, but it comes out more like a huff, likely from how tightly she’s pulled against Kara’s chest.

“Kara, you can let me go now,” she hums after a minute. Kara pulls back for a minute, glancing down at Lena before wrapping Lena in a hug again, mostly to avoid thinking about the flush she can feel creeping up her neck and onto her cheeks. She can feel Lena shaking her head, and the girl gives a snort, but she tucks her forehead against the blonde’s shoulder anyway.

She’s breathtaking. When did she get so beautiful? Kara’s always thought she was pretty, but this is something else. Suddenly, her eyes look greener and her hair looks softer and it’s almost like she’s glowing.

(Merlin, Alex is so going to make fun of her later.)

-  
Kara feels at home again the first time she steps onto the Quidditch pitch since the beginning of the summer.

Tommy’s already there, setting up for the Hufflepuff try-outs. As the team’s Keeper, she’s agreed to come down and help him test potential new players, considering two out of their three chasers graduated last year, and one of their beaters quit Quidditch to put more time into his studies for his seventh year.

“Kara,” Tommy says, lips stretched into a wide grin. “Nice to see you again.”

She smiles, offering him a salute. “You too, Captain.”

“You ready to get back up in the air?”

“Oh, of course,” she replies, and he laughs, tossing the Quaffle back and forth between his hands.

“Go on and fly then, Supergirl,” he tells her, and she beams at him once before throwing a leg over her broom and pushing herself off the ground, beaming the whole way. The wind whistles in her ears as she soars into the air, racing from one end of the pitch to the other and circling around the goal posts before flying back. Below her, Tommy looks like he’s only an inch or two tall, and the ball tucked under his arm seems smaller than the head of a push pin. She’d flown a couple times over the summer, when she’d had a chance, but it never makes her feel at home the way it does at school.

After a few minutes, she touches back down. By now, their beater has shown up, and a couple of students have already shown up for try-outs, even though they’re more than ten minutes early.

“Have a nice flight?” Tommy asks. Kara nods.

“Barry’s going to be jealous that I was out here flying before him,” she replies.

He laughs. “The kid’ll be fine,” he assures her, tossing her the Quaffle. “I’m sure he got to do his fair share of flying over the summer. Now, are you ready to try out some fresh meat?”

Their beater rolls her eyes. “They’re not fresh meat, Tom,” she protests, grinning. “They’re kids, give them a break.”

“They’re kids I’m about to put through the ringer,” he tells her, and a few of the younger students go a little wide-eyed. Kara gives him a soft shove, and he laughs, clearly well-aware of what he’s doing.

“Let’s just get this show on the road,” he says, turning to the handful of kids lined up and holding their brooms. He gives both Kara and the beater a nod, and without speaking, the two of them are flying off into the air, Kara still holding fast to the ball while their beater is swinging her bat back and forth, as if testing the weight in her hands.

“You two ready?” Tommy calls.

“Ready!” Kara and the beater both reply, almost exactly in sync. He gives them an impish grin before taking off straight into the sky, a fleet of other students following behind him. Kara smiles, tosses the Quaffle to him, speeding off towards the goal as he bounces it a couple times before passing it off to one of the younger kids, directing the girl to try and score a goal.

(She looks back and forth between Kara and Tommy as if she’s confused, and Kara’s beginning to think the girl isn’t going to do anything when suddenly, she blinks and she’s right in front of her, coming at the goalpost with the Quaffle like the He Who Shall Not Be Named is hot on her heels.

Kara decides she likes her from the moment the Quaffle soars past her, and when she tells Tommy after try-outs, he agrees whole-heartedly.

That’s how Patty Spivot, along with another fourth-year and a fifth year, joins the Hufflepuff Quidditch team.)

-

(Lena’s standing near the entrance to the pitch when try-outs finish. Kara skips over, still grinning, with her broom tossed over her shoulder.

“You came to pick me up from try-outs,” Kara says, a little surprised.

“Of course I did,” Lena replies. “What are friends for?)

-

Kara finds out Lena has feelings for her on what, by all accounts, should have been a regular Thursday.

She’s at breakfast sitting opposite Alex and Maggie, crunching on a piece of bacon and, admittedly, talking about Lena. It’s not something new, or out of the ordinary for her, but for some reason, today seems to be Alex’s breaking point, and she looks up at Kara with nothing short of pure exasperation in her eyes.

“You know she likes you, right?”

The words drop from Alex’s lips and later, Kara will swear her heart skipped a beat. If she were paying enough attention, she would notice the look Maggie is giving Alex, but all she can see is Alex staring at her while her own heartbeat thumps in her ears while silence drags out between the three of them.

“What?” 

“She likes you!” Alex repeats. “Oh my god, you are both so damn into each other, it’s nauseating! Every time we’re alone, it’s ‘Lena this’ and ‘Lena that’ and ‘golly, Lena just looked so pretty today, didn’t she Alex?” and I’m sick of it! I am not wasting another minute of my life watching you two pretend like you are desperately gay for eachother!”

Kara blanks, and then- “I don’t say golly!”

“Really?” Alex replies, narrowing her eyebrows. “That’s what you’re choosing to focus on?”

“I- I mean- there’s no- I don’t-” Kara stammers, suddenly unable to come up with any words to express the complete short circuit her brain is going through. With a sigh, Maggie drops her head into her hands, and it snaps Kara back to reality, so to say.

“Why are you- Why didn’t you tell me?” She asks, incredulous.

“I was trying to let the two of you figure this out on your own-” her sister starts, but Maggie cuts her off.

“Great job of that, Alex,” she mutters

Alex nudges the other girl in the side before continuing. “-But this whole dance you and Lena have going on? I’m getting tired of it, and you two clearly weren’t realizing anything on your own.”

“I-”

“So please,” Alex pleads. “Do something about it. I’m begging you.”

In timing so perfect it’s almost comedic, footsteps approach them and Lena’s there, clearly having just woken up and running a little late. Her hair is still a little bit frizzy, and she reaches over Kara to snatch a piece of toast from the spread laid out on the table.

“Morning guys,” she says. “I’ve got to go, I’m supposed to talk to Professor M’orzz before class.”

Warmth blooms on Kara’s shoulder when Lena lays her hand there, and the brunette offers her a smile before walking away. Kara turns back to her sister and Maggie, who are both giving her very pointed looks. She glances back at Lena once before turning to Alex, who raises an eyebrow almost in challenge. With a sudden rush of determination, she slaps both hands on the table to push herself up before speeding after Lena.

“Lena, wait!” She calls, and the other girl looks back at her over her shoulder. Kara takes a couple long strides forward until they’re matching each other step for step.

“What’s wrong?” Lena asks, swallowing her mouthful of bread.

“Can you meet me later today?” Kara says. “In the courtyard?”

“I’ve got classes all morning, and I’m helping Professor Stein organize his textbooks during break,” Lena replies, sounding apologetic. “And after lunch, I’m studying with Winn, and then you have Ancient Runes.”

“Um…” Kara hums, trailing off. “We could always skip lunch?”

Lena blinks at her in shock. “You?” She replies. “You’re skipping a meal.”

“It’s important.”

“Um, okay,” Lena agrees, her brow furrowing in concern. “Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” Kara replies, slapping on a smile to cover for the racing of her heart in her chest. Lena looks a little less than convinced, but she nods nevertheless.

“Okay,” Lena agrees, before glancing down at the watch on her wrist. “But I really do have to go, I’m supposed to be meeting with Professor M’orzz in two minutes.”

Kara bids her bye and watches her go with her pulse still roaring far too fast, and when she looks back at the table, Alex has her face buried in Maggie’s shoulder, and the Gryffindor is offering her a thumbs up, wearing a smile that causes her eyes to crinkle up in the corners.

And, oh God, she would have so much more time to panic if it wasn’t for the fact that she’s only now remembering that she agreed to meet Tommy and Barry on the pitch in a few minutes, and she left her broom in her dorm room.

-

(“You seem distracted, Supergirl,” Tommy says, raising an eyebrow at Kara. The two of them are hovering in the air far, far off the ground, and he’s got the Quaffle tucked under his arm. Barry, a buzzing snitch trapped in his hands, floats around them in lazy circles.

“It’s- it’s nothing,” she assures him. Tommy looks wholly unconvinced by it.

“You know, if something is wrong, or you’re confused, you can always talk to me,” he tells her. She glances over at him, and his eyes are genuine.

She hesitates for a moment before speaking. “It’s just- how do you tell a girl you like her?” She asks.

Barry jerks so fast she’s afraid he’s going to fall off of his broom. “You’re going to tell Lena you like her?” He blurts, wearing a wide-eyed kind of shock, and she sputters.

“How did you know?”

“Kara, you’re my best friend,” he tells her, almost as if he’s disappointed in her for not realizing he knew. “Don’t you think I had to notice the way you stare about her, or talk about her all the time?”

She blanches, and Tommy looks rather amused by the whole thing. “Do you still want my advice?”

“Yes please,” Kara squeaks, even though she can already feel the red creeping up her cheeks.

“It’s going to sound cheesy, but you’ve just got to be honest,” he says, floating a little closer to rest his free hand, the one not holding the Quaffle, on her shoulder. “Speak from the heart.”)

(She doesn’t know how to speak from her heart when right now, even her heartbeat sounds like Lena’s name to her.

_Le-na. Le-na. Le-na._ )

-

She gets to the courtyard first, skipping out on Barry and Tommy a little bit early so she can stash her broom in her room and make it outside in time to meet Lena. Still, she definitely miscalculates how long it’ll take her, because classes still have a few more minutes before they even let out for lunch. Bouncing against the balls of her feet, she leans back against one of the walls and waits.

Minutes pass, and her nerves are starting to amp up when she sees Lena step outside. Like that, the buzzing in her veins stops, and so does her fidgeting, leaving her as something akin to a stone statue as Lena starts to make her way over.

“Is everything okay?” She asks, and the expression of her face reflects the way Kara felt a couple seconds ago.

“Um, yeah,” Kara says, because now that this is happening, now that she’s confronting everything, it all feels so fast. And somehow, she wants it to go faster.

“What did you want to-”

“Alex told me you have a crush on me,” she blurts.

“She did?”

Lena’s voice sounds small, and a little piece of Kara is currently kicking itself, because leading with that was certainly not the best option, not when Lena’s looking at her like that, like she’s just been slapped.

“Yeah, but like, not because she was trying to be rude” the blonde stammers, and as she goes on, she can see the way Lena’s eyes start to glaze over the slightest, clearly tuning out of whatever Kara’s saying. Still, she keeps going, mostly due to the panic rising in her stomach.

“She was just trying to be helpful,” Kara continues. “Like, she knew how you felt but she was just trying to get me to do something about it, because apparently I’m really oblivious and don’t know how to tell when someone likes me unless I’m outright told about it, and Merlin, you aren’t even really listening to me-”

She pauses to take a breath, and it’s like Lena snaps back to reality, cutting her off mid-rant. “Kara, I’m so sorry,” she apologizes. “But it’s- I would never do anything to hurt our friendship, it doesn’t have to mean anything, I understand if you want some space-”

“What- Lena, no!” Kara interrupts. “It’s- that’s the last thing I want!”

“I… I don’t understand,” Lena says, and Kara takes one look at her wide, green eyes before doing the only thing she can think of to get her point across: she leans forward and kisses her.

There’s a moment, maybe a second, where Lena freezes, going almost completely still. In that long second, Kara’s mind races. Did Alex lie? Was this not the right thing to do? Is she completely misreading the situation? What-

(Her mind effectively stops when Lena starts to respond.)

She feels a hand ghosting against her skin, arms being draped over her shoulders, and Lena’s fingers tangling in her hair, pulling at her scalp. A noise starts to form in the back of her throat, and she pulls back to say something. Anything, really, but she barely opens her mouth before Lena is pulling her back down and fitting their lips together again.

When she finally pulls away, Lena drops her head onto Kara’s shoulder, and the blonde tips her head back with a sort of happy huff, an almost laugh.

“Tell me that meant something to you,” Lena breathes.

“Everything about you means something to me,” Kara whispers, and the other girl’s breath catches in a funny way. “I didn’t realize it at first, how I felt about you. But then, at that Quidditch match, when I saw you wearing my scarf, I… I think I just knew then, y’know? That you were what I wanted.”

“I knew since you were dating James,” Lena admits. “I was- I was so _jealous_ of him.”

“Since James? Lena, that was our third-year, you-”

“I had just turned fourteen, yeah.”

Kara hums, and Lena looks up at the sound of the noise. “I’m sorry I made you wait so long,” Kara says, and Lena laughs, tucking her face against Kara’s neck again.

(She feels a little less sorry when Lena starts trailing kiss along the underside of her jaw.)

-

(Maggie grabs her forearm one day as they’re leaving breakfast. Kara turns around in surprise, thrown off by the rather serious look on the other girl’s face.

“You’re Alex’s sister,” Maggie says. “And I like you, Kara, I really do. But you can’t ever hurt Lena.”

Kara blinks. “Um- I won’t,” she replies.

Just like that, Maggie offers her an easy smile, releasing the grip she has an Kara’s  arm. “Then we’re all good,” she tells her, and walks away as if it were nothing.

Kara’s still standing in the hallway, staring at the spot where Maggie stood in a sort of shock, when Leslie Willis brushes past her, elbows bumping into each other.

“Be good to her,” she threatens, not even bothering to look at Kara as she stalks off in the same direction Maggie did, leaving the blonde even more confused, because why does everybody suddenly think she’s going to hurt Lena?)

(She doesn’t realize it’s because she now has the power to do it, more so than before.)

-

They win the Quidditch cup in Kara’s fifth year.

They play against Slytherin, who’s already beaten them this year, and the match goes on for more than three hours. To top if off, the sky opens up two-thirds of the way through, driving several specators inside and drenching them all. Kara’s pulled her hair up into a ponytail, but several strands keep falling loose, plastering themselves to her cheeks and neck.

You’d think, after three hours, that there would be some divide in points, a show of who’s doing better. That was not true here, though, when every time one team managed to get ten or twenty points ahead, the other would swoop in and take the lead back. And when that goes for over three hours, the scores only climb higher and higher.

_60-80  
_

_170-160  
_

_230-250  
_

_340-330  
_

By now, everyone’s getting tired. The snitch had a late start, being released around fifteen minutes after the first hours. Both seekers are starting to show obvious signs of fatigue from a non-stop chase across the pitch. Kara feels ready to fall over herself, and the rest of her team, or the Slytherin team for that matter, all look like they feel about the same. She wonders how long they’d have to play for both captains to come to an agreement to end the game, but she knows Tommy’d be hard-pressed to surrender the Quidditch cup.

When the game finally ends, it doesn’t feel real at first. When she looks to her side and sees Barry staring down at his closed hand in a sort of shock, she blinks a couple times, like what she thinks she’s seeing isn’t real. But then, he glances over at her, and a smile starts to stretch over his face before he throws his fist up in the air with a cheer. Grinning, she echoes it, and the rest of the team starts to shout as well, chasing each other around the pitch as if they haven’t been playing for almost three and a half hours. Barry starts to dive down to the ground, and Kara follows, barely managing to keep upright when she touches down and her feet slide on the muddy ground.

The Slytherin team captain, a well muscled guy named Oliver who happens to be Tommy’s best friend, congratulates them all after he lands. He offers just a hint of a smile, lips quirking up in the corners, but it feels geniune.

“You guys played well,” he tells them, clapping both Kara and Barry on the shoulders. “Maybe we’ll be playing together in the big leagues one day.”

“Oh, they’ll be playing together,” Tommy interjects. ‘But not with you, Queen.”

“Shove it, Merlyn,” Oliver replies, and he and Tommy walk off towards the locker room, still picking at each other. After a minute, Kara and Barry follow, and they peel themselves out of their wet robes and climb into dry clothes.

Outside the changing room, Kara finds Lena, Alex, and Maggie both waiting for her. True to tradition, Lena has Kara’s scarf wrapped around her neck, but now when Kara has the urge to grab the ends and tug Lena to her, she can, so she does. Lena smiles against her lips, and Kara has to break the kiss when giddy laughter starts to bubble up from her chest.

“Do you want me to sneak you into the Hufflepuff dorms?” She asks. “There’s going to be a party.”

“Go celebrate with your team,” Lena tells her. “I’ll meet you outside the common room later, okay?”

Kara agrees, a little reculatantly, and she only has a moment to greet her sister and her girlfriend before Barry is grabbing her hand and dragging her off down the hall towards their dorm.

The Hufflepuff common room is alight with victory by the time they get there. When they see him, two of the chasers prop Barry on their shoulders and parade him around with whooping cheers. Barry himself is grinning like a madman, his cheeks red from playing and laughing.

Somewhere along the line, someone breaks out pumpkin juice, and a cup is pushed into Kara’s hand. It only takes a sip for her to know that it is very much spiked with Firewhiskey, so she takes it slow, sparingly.

As the night wears on the, the noise of celebration quiets a little, but the common room is still loud and full of people high on the victory of winning the Quidditch cup. Somewhere along the way, she finds herself leaning against the wall beside Tommy, who’s nursing his own cup and chuckling.

(Maybe it’s all the juice she’s had already, but she doesn’t really know what compels her to open her mouth.)

“You gave me a broom,” she blurts, shocking them both.

“I did,” he confirms, as if it were up to debate. “What about it?”

“I just- you gave me a broom,” she repeats, as if it were an explanation. “Like, here I am, this nervous fourth year who’s never played on a team before, and here you are, running around and giving out broomsticks!”

“It’s not about giving them something material,” he tells her, and she gives him a confused glance. “It’s about showing them you believe they’re worth it. It’s about lifting them up.”

She tilts her head, and he smiles. “Plus, there’s nothing better than seeing the new kid’s face light up like it’s Christmas morning,” he adds. “You’ll wanna know that, captain.”

Kara blinks. “Captain.”

He turns to her. From the look he’s wearing, she can tell that he’s at least a little bit buzzed by now. He raises a finger to his lips and grins, a slow and lazy stretch across his face.

“It’s supposed to be a secret,” he says. “Act surprised, okay?”

She laughs, head tipped back. Her chest is warm from the win and the pumpkin juice and the joy filling the common room. “I will, don’t worry,” she replies. “I’ll be the most surprised.”

“Good,” he praises, and claps a hand on her shoulder. Despite the fact that they’re both tipsy, his eyes are genuine when he speaks.

“You’ll make a great captain.”

-

(Kara slips out of the room later that night to meet Lena in the corridor nearby. Kara pushes the other girl against the wall and buries her face in her neck, giggling like an idiot.

“Are you drunk?” Lena asks, breathless and laughing. “I can smell the Firewhiskey on your breath.”

“Just buzzed, a little,” the blonde answers, and in her mind, it’s mostly true. “I’m mostly high on the win, promise. And you.”

“And me?”

“And you,” Kara repeats. “You are… so hot.”

“Okay, you are definitely drunk,” Lena says, laughing even as the other girl tries to protest. “Come on, let’s get you to your room.”)

-

(Kara tries her hardest, her very hardest, to convince Lena to come home with her this summer.

She knows it’s all in vain, though, when that damned letter falls onto the table in front of them. Lena’s face goes the worst, palest sort of blank when she reads it, and when she whispers Kara’s name, the blonde notices the blood welling from a cut on Lena’s finger, dripping down onto the envelope.

“I don’t think I’m going to be able to come to your house this summer.”

Kara glances between the paper in Lena’s hand to the look on her face and- _Oh. Oh no._ )

(It feels like something is coming crashing down on them, but she doesn’t know what.)

-

Lena doesn’t say much once they board the train. Instead, she goes an odd sort of silent, her grip on Kara’s hand nearing a white knuckled kind of tight.

She thinks back to the letter, Lena’s lost expression, and she lays herself out in a way on the seat that Lena can curl against her chest. Without speaking, the other girl does, ear pressed against the spot where Kara’s heartbeat thrums.

Kara wants to say something ridiculous, something cheesy, like ‘my heart beats for you’, but she says nothing instead, holds Lena in the quiet of the compartment, lets Winn and Barry’s murmuring wash over them both while she whispers in Lena’s ears instead.

An hour or two later, Lena sits up a little bit, involves herself in the boys’ conversation. Kara can tell she’s trying to be present, almost like she’s soaking them all in.

Barry, ever the jokester, suggests running away. They all know it’s not going to happen, but they tease each other anyway, especially when Kara and Barry get into an argument about who’s house Lena should be running away to, Kara insisting that she’s the logical choice while Barry points out that he’s closer. Winn steadfastly tries to stay impartial until pressured to pick a side and mutters that he thinks Barry has a better case. Kara crows her disagreement, and Lena muffles her laughter in Kara’s neck.

“Nobody loves me,” the blonde whines.

“Hey!” Lena protests, hand on her chest as if she were offended.

“They’re both traitors,” Kara mutters, pouting and shooting a glare in Barry and Winn’s direction. “Lena, if you were to run away, you’d be coming to my house, right?”

“Oh, I always run to you, darling,” she says, looking up at Kara through her lashes with a playful smirk . Her cheeks are a rosy shade between red and pink, and she looks as if she’s forgotten all the terrible things she thinks are waiting for her at home. Acting on her own impulses, Kara surges forward, hand on the other girl’s cheek, and kisses her. Lena grins, tossing an arm around Kara’s neck, giggling when both the boys protest.

(Lena, all bright green eyes and teasing smiles, makes an almost lewd comment about what some guys would do to see the things Barry and Winn witness for free, and the latter goes red while the former groans and drops his head into his hands. Kara tips her head back and laughs, free and loud.)

“She might be running to your house for Maggie, though,” Winn mutters. In response, Kara reaches into her bag and grabs a paperback, throwing it across the compartment at him. He squawks, trying to smack it out of the air, but instead it hits him in the cheek.

“Wow, Kara, I never took you for the violent type,” Barry teases. “I’m not sure I like this new side of you.”

Kara glares at him, and Lena chuckles into the other girl’s chest. “I love you guys,” she mumbles, still grinning.

(She lifts her head, and Kara is struck again for maybe the thousandth time how beautiful Lena is. She thinks, no matter what happens this summer, this is the Lena she’s always going to want to treasure, her pink lips smiling, and those bright green eyes that always shine.)

(Later, when Lena’s walking away from her in a courtyard, she’ll think back to this moment and wonder how this bright, bright girl slipped away from her.

She doesn’t know that yet, though. All she knows now is that she wants this for forever, if she can have that.)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, reading back through this chapter: why is this,,,, so,,,, gay?????


	6. oh, what a thing to have done

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When things seem to go wrong, Kara thinks, they really go wrong.
> 
> or, a helpful serving of angst

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m a big mess who got really emotional re-reading chapter six of made of starlight, so i started writing this before i even finished CHAPTER FOUR  
> chapter six is always the long one :’D

At the very beginning of their summer vacation, Kara watches Lena walk away with a sick sort of nerves churning in her gut. Nothing about it feels right. In fact, something feels very, very wrong.

(She’s already starting to write a letter in her head, as soon as possible, so she can get it down on paper and send it to Lena, if only to hear something back from her.)

Alex and Maggie, to her surprise, don’t even really tease her about it. Kara thinks it’s because they both feel the same thing she does, that same creeping feeling almost like fear, but neither of them say it to her.

Still, within the first few days, she’s putting her pen to paper, and she’s sending the letter off barely a week after school’s ended. So she’s a little eager, sue her, but the thought of receiving a response calms the churning in her stomach just that slightest bit, so she sends it off with barely any hesitation or regret, and then waits.

And waits. And waits.

And waits.

She goes days hearing nothing from Lena, and the longer it goes on, it makes her a horrible sort of nervous. She pretends she feels better than she does, like it’s easy, like everything is fine, Alex!, but it doesn’t really feel that way.

When she finally gets a letter back, both relief and unease crash over her in waves. Alex smiles like everything is fine and fixed, but Kara only nods along, because it still feels so, so wrong. She doesn’t hesitate in ripping the envelope open, but when she starts to read, those same old nerves rise right back into her throat like they live there.

Something’s wrong with Lena.

It’s not something she can explain, or rationalize, she just knows, in the same with she knows the curve of Lena’s lips and the line of her jaw.

She tries to be calm, she really does. But Alex calls her neurotic, and Maggie only looks at her with that odd sort of sympathetic understanding that she’s mastered, and it all makes her feel so out of control.

She tries to get answers, from herself, from her sister, from Lena, but no matter where she goes, she gets nothing. Alex is clueless, Kara can’t figure out what she’s done wrong, and Lena keeps insisting in her letters that everything’s okay.

The closer they get to the next school year, the more Kara feels the pressure building in her chest. Alex notices it, Maggie notices it, even Eliza does, too

By the time she’s wheeling her luggage through the wall and into platform Nine and Three Quarters, she can feel her bones almost buzzing with nervous energy.

When she sees Lena again, standing in the train compartment, it’s like all the tension building in her explodes into relief, and she moves forward to cup Lena’s cheeks in her hands.

There’s a moment, just a moment, where Lena feels rigid, but then she goes soft under Kara’s fingers, pliant, and the blonde almost laughs in response, moving from Lena’s eyes to her nose and her forehead until she’s sure she’s touched every inch of the other girl’s face with her lips. 

(Lena’s grinning by the time Kara actually kisses her, and it tastes like relief.)

-

(Kara would be blind, though, if she didn’t notice the way Lena changes.

Suddenly, despite the fact that they’re finally both in the same place at the same time in the past three months, Lena seems almost more elusive than before. Plans are hard to make and even harder to keep, and even though classes have barely even started, the other girl starts using studying and homework as excuses to dodge Kara and skip meals.

She’s not an idiot, she knows Lena’s avoiding her.)

(She thinks back to that letter, the way Lena’s hands shook, and it burns her throat like acid.)

-

Quidditch try-outs almost manage to sneak up on her this year. Almost.

It’s hard to forget, though, when she not only has Barry to remind her, but herself. She’s the captain now, of the whole team. She’s the one who calls the shots on who makes the team, organizes practice, everything. Before, she was just the keeper. Her only job was keeping the Quaffle out of her goal posts, and she was good at it. Now, she has to watch over everyone, make sure they’re staying on top of their game, that they’re getting better with every game. In a very Quidditch-oriented sense, she has the whole Hufflepuff name resting on her shoulders.

(Sometimes, she feels the pressure on her shoulders like it’s something tangible. Tommy left her with big shoes to feel, and she thinks she may never manage to be as good of a captain as he was, but she knows she has to try.)

When try-outs start, she’s all but bouncing on energy. Beside her are Patty and Barry, the latter filling in for their beater while the former is there as a chaser. There’s a bunch of kids all standing in front of her from various years, a couple second years, but it’s mostly some from their third or fourth years, one or two even older than that.

There’s not a lot of spots this year, just a beater and one of their chasers. It makes Kara feel a little bad, especially when she sees just how many other students want those two spots, but she can’t do much about it unless she’s willing to kick people off the team, which she isn’t.

Once Kara realizes how long she’s been standing there, simply observing rather than starting, she claps her hands together with a nervous smile. “Alright,” she starts. “Let’s play some Quidditch!”

With Patty and Barry’s help, she runs them all through several drills Tommy used to have them do, watching each of them closely. There’s a couple of kids who very obviously have never played any sort of Quidditch before, and have likely only ever been on a broom in flying lessons, but there’s also some who are already starting to show some talent.

They move on from drills to a couple pick up games, and as the keeper, Kara is able to camp out at the goal posts and watch the entire pitc. By the time try-outs end, she’s got a pretty good idea of which students she wants on the team. After all the other kids file out, Patty following them after a dew minutes, leaving Kara and Barry alone on the grass.

“How was your first real day as captain?” He asks.

She grinned in response. “Awesome,” she replied, and he laughed, reaching out to high-five her.

They start to walk towards the locker room, and Barry turns to her with a slightly more somber expression.

“How’re things going with Lena?”

It’s a little like a spell is broken: some of the excitement seems to drain right out of her, and she sighs, flipping some of her hair out of her face.

“I don’t- Still not good,” she admits. “She still won’t talk to me, and she’s obviously avoiding me, so nothing’s really changed. I just- I just don’t understand how things got like this, how it went bad so quickly.”

“What are you going to do about it?”

“I’m going to try and talk to her,” Kara says. “I can’t- I don’t want to keep doing this all the time. It makes me feel terrible, and from what I see of Lena these days, she doesn’t look so happy either.”

“Things’ll work out,” Barry assures her, one hand on her shoulder. “And no matter what, I’ve got your back.”

“I hope so,’’ she whispers, glancing at the doors to the locker room. “I hope so.”

-

(Barry might be right, he might be wrong, it really just depends on what you think counts as ‘worked out’.)

-

She manages to convince Lena to meet her out in the courtyard one afternoon.

It’s harder than it should be, getting her girlfriend to spend time with her. Telling, too, but Kara does her best not to dwell on it as she waits, even as the anxiety starts to sink into her bones.

(There are two things Kara knows, two things she’s never admitted out loud.

The first is that she loves Lena, loves her, so much she thinks it might be the death of her.

The second is that Lena is a flight risk. Kara knows she runs when she gets scared, like a wide-eyed deer.

Both of these things scare her.)

Kara has a bad habit of never being on time, always late or wildly early. When she gets to the courtyard to meet Lena, it’s the latter, so she hops up on the wall to wait.

Lena doesn’t take too long. Any sort of anxiety Kara feels jumps up tenfold the second she sees her, and silence descends over the both of them as Lena makes her way over to sit beside Kara, neither of them speaking.

“You’ve been pulling away from me,” Kara murmurs, when the quiet finally becomes too much to bear.

“I have,” Lena agrees, and the blonde feels her shoulders slump, the soft confirmation hitting her right in the gut.

“I don’t- I don’t understand,” she whispers, looking over at Lena, who turns her gaze to the ground instead, lower lip pulled between her teeth. The silence of it all is what starts to grate on Kara’s nerves, and she finds that there’s irritation starting to simmer in her chest.

“Aren’t you going to say something?” 

“What do you want from me?” Lena replies, but she seems more resigned than anything. “That this isn’t sustainable? That I’m a Luthor and all I do is destroy things? That I’m here to break your heart?”

“So you’re breaking up with me?”

“Kara, you don’t understand,” the. brunette protests, and a little dimly, Kara notes that now her frustration is starting to grow to. “This can’t- this won’t- this isn’t going to work. My mother-”

At those words, Kara springs to her feet, and the warmth in her eyes picks up as she curls her hands into fists, fingernails digging into her palms.

“I can’t believe that you’re doing this for your mother!” Kara shouts. 

“Don’t you see? I’m doing this for you!” Lena argues. “You don’t know what she could do to you, and the worst part is that neither do I! You are not something I am willing to risk!”

“I don’t want you to be doing this for me!” Kara replies, turning desperate. “Lena, all I want is you!”

By now, Lena’s started to cry, wet lines trailing down from her eyes and starting to drip onto her robes. “Fine,” she says, voice soft despite the fact that they were yelling at each other only a few moments ago. “Then if I’m not doing this for you, I’m doing it for me.”

“Lee-” Kara tries, but the other girl cuts her off.

“Please, don’t,” Lena whispers, eyes dropping to the ground. “It’s just going to make this so much worse for both of us. It’s… it’s better if I just walk away now.”

“Don’t. Please, don’t walk away from this,” Kara pleads. Every single cell in her body, every nerve and every drop of blood, seems like it’s shouting at her, urging her to just reach out and touch the other girl, but she finds her feet frozen to the spot.

“I’m sorry,” Lena apologizes, and without turning to look back at Kara, rushes back inside the castle. Now alone outside, the blonde slowly sinks towards the ground, back against the cool stone of the fountain, and she stays there until Alex finds her half an hour later.

-

(Lena disappears from her life as if she wasn’t even there. 

It’s like she pulls herself out of everything, until there’s this giant hole left behind. She studies alone with Barry in the courtyard, and Winn slides over to fill in Lena’s spot at the table so she doesn’t have to look at it anymore. Alex quits trying to get her to eat vegetables at meals, and Lucy quits making innuendos to Kara when there’s no Lena to tease her about.

She sees her in the halls sometimes, and it stings like peroxide alcohol on a fresh cut.)

-

(It gets better. It takes a while, but it does.

Eventually, it doesn’t hurt to be out in the courtyard with Barry, and she laughs as he beats her at Exploding Snap. Alex scoops vegetables onto her plate, and both she and Maggie give her matching glares until she eats them. Lucy teases her whenever she finds an opportunity, and Winn still rambles on about various tech and science things even though Lena isn’t there to debate them with him.

She still misses Lena, but it doesn’t feel like a gaping wound in her chest anymore. Instead, it’s a bittersweet kind of sadness, like fading memories.

She’d be lying though, if she said she didn’t lie awake sometimes, staring at the ceiling and wishing Lena was tucked into her side.)

-

A big part of what helps Kara heal is, in the end, Quidditch.

After all, she’s the captain of the team now, and no matter what, she’s got an obligation to her players, to make sure her team is learning the best they can, playing the best they can. It’s a duty that Tommy left to her, almost like a legacy, and she’s not going to let it slip away from her, no matter what else is going on.

Instead of thinking about Lena, replaying what happened, wondering what she could have done differently, she throws herself into practices, into training. She spends any free time from classes and studying on the pitch, playing quick-up games with her team, working one-on-one with each and every one of her players, honing her own game. Her chasers think quicker, her beaters hit harder, and Barry flies even faster before. Together, the Hufflepuff team logs more time on the pitch than any other house does.

In their early games at the beginning of the year, her team has some flubs, a lot of easy mistakes that cost them a few games, especially to Ravenclaw. Out off all the houses, Ravenclaw is the only one that hasn’t had captain turnover this year. Since James has graduated, Lucy’s taken over the Gryffindor team, and Oliver Queen passed the Slytherin mantle down to his younger sister. However, as the year goes on, all of the new captains start to hit their stride, especially Kara and Thea Queen. Both Slytherin and Hufflepuff become the teams to beat, in the same way that they’ve been the last two years, a friendly sort of rivalry.

Kara finds herself quite lucky, she thinks, because she inherited a great team from Tommy, some of her own talent from him, and she hopes that if he were to see how they were doing, he’d be proud of her.

(She doesn’t have to hope, though, because Thea catches her arm one day after a long, drawn-out game between Hufflepuff and Slytherin.

“I told Merlyn about all the work you’ve been putting into your team,” she says, and it takes a moment to register with Kara that she’s talking about Tommy. “He says he’s proud of you.”

She offers Kara just a small quirk of her lips before disappearing down the tunnel to the locker room, and when it finally registers what Thea said, Kara smiles, a little bit of warmth stirring up in her chest.

“Thanks, Tommy,” she whispers, and even though the Quidditch pitch is empty.)

-

Kara rides the train home for break and tries to ignore the fact that Lena’s somewhere inside, in a different compartment than her and (their friends? her friends?) the boys.

She doesn’t see her when the get on, but when they get off, she does catch sight of Lena across the platform, standing with her mother. This is only maybe the second or third time she’s seen the woman, and even though she’s maybe a couple inches taller than Lena, she seems to loom over her. There’s no affection on her face, and the cold hand she places on Lena’s shoulder is a stark contrast to the pairs of students and parents hugging around them, from Eliza warmly greeting Maggie and Alex a few feet away from Kara herself.

(She sees the way Lena flinches under her mother’s touch, and she can feel the same flinching in her chest.)

Alex reaches over and catches her wrist, snapping her out of her thoughts. Something sympathetic passes over her face, but it’s washed away when Alex smiles at her and pulls her along after her.

Having Maggie over for break doesn’t seem to change much, especially considering she’s spent the past two summers at their house. Christmas, in the end, feels like an extension of that. If Kara’s honest, she was a little bit worried that somehow it would turn out to be odd or weird, but it isn’t.

What is weird, however, is when Barry asks to talk to Maggie. He calls, and when she answers, her face twists a little oddly, and she leaves the room in silence, phone still pressed to her ear. After she’s gone, Kara and Alex glance at each other, as if the other one knows what’s going on.

They forget about it soon after Maggie comes back, distracted by another conversation, and whatever Barry’s issue was won’t seem to matter for a while.

Christmas day itself is bright. She wakes up earlier than everyone else, and she only manages to wait half an hour before waking Alex up, and by extension, Maggie. Her sister grumbles, of course, but it loses it’s weight when she smiles, because it’s Christmas, Alex!

After that, they wake Eliza up, and Kara drags them all down into the living room to open presents. Maggie blinks in surprise when she takes in the fact that there’s a stack of presents for her under the tree just as large as Alex and Kara’s, and none of them tease her about it, but there are definitely tears in her eyes when she hugs Eliza, who only laughs.

Once gifts are done, they move onto breakfast. Kara helps Eliza make pancakes, sneaking chocolate chips when she thinks nobody’s watching, grinning when Eliza half-heartedly swats her with a spatula. Alex teases her for it from the living room, and Kara sticks her tongue out in response.

(It’s a good morning, and in that moments, Kara feels fully and wholly herself again.)

She talks to Winn late in the afternoon, before dinner but long after presents have been opened. His eyes are bright when he smiles at her, and she makes sure to say hello to his mother before he has to hang up to eat, wishing her happy holidays before disconnecting.

Everyone helps Eliza make dinner, and afterwards, Kara gets roped into playing a couple games with Alex and Maggie, most of which she loses at. In fact, the only thing she wins consistently is a game Winn showed them called Twister, and only because Kara, as clumsy as she is, has longer limbs than the other two. It ends when her phone starts going off again, ringtone blaring and startling Alex. causing her to jump. One of her arms buckles, and her leg slides out from under her, causing her to fall and take Maggie down with her. Kara cheers before going to answer her still buzzing phone.

It’s Barry, and when she answers, there’s a bright, if sly, grin on his face. He glances at something beside him, something she can’t see, and it only grows before he turns to her.

_“Merry Christmas!”_

She laughs, parroting it back to him. Whatever he was looking at earlier, it clearly still has some of his attention, because he keeps turning his head.

_“How was your day?”_

“It was great!” Kara replies. “I played games with Alex and Maggie, and dinner was amazing! How was yours, how are your parents? What did you get?”

_“Oh, mom and dad are great. And actually, I got a really great gift this year, but it wasn’t from them.”_

“Who was it from?”

_“Lena.”_

Kara blanks, for a second. “Oh,” she answers, finally. “What did she give you?”

_“Oh, her charming presence.”_

“I’m sorry, _what?”_

_“Oh yeah, she’s here. She’s actually sitting next to me right now, and I really think you should talk to her.”  
_

“Barry, I- what?” She repeats, but he only grins.

_“Anyway, I’m now going to pass the phone to Lena, have fun, merry Christmas!”_

There’s a blur of movement, and Kara doesn’t really process what he’s said until the image on her screen focuses and Lena’s face is there, wearing a shell-shocked expression and staring at something off screen, most likely Barry.

“Lena?”

The name drops from her lips like a whisper, but the other girl doesn’t respond until there’s a distant slamming sound. When she glances at the screen, she makes a soft noise that only just comes through the speakers on Kara’s end, and then, there’s silence.

“I- why are you with Barry?” Kara asks, when she can finally manage the nerve to say something.

_“I got into it with my mom.”_

Lena’s voice breaks when she says it, in a way that means there’s clearly more to the story. Skype’s picture is a little grainy, largely due to Barry’s less than stellar connection, but Kara can still see the look on Lena’s face, the downcast eyes, but most of all, she can hear how defeated it sounds.

“Are you okay? What happened?”

_“I’m okay,”_ Lena replies, but it sounds hollow. _“It’s okay, really, except that she told me to never come back and I’m kind of both homeless and broke, now, and I made so many terrible decisions all for a woman who was never going to love me that I wish I could take back.”_

Kara’s chest cracks. “I- Lena, you don’t seem okay.”

_“I’m not. But I- it was a good thing, it has to have been a good thing. Lillian didn’t- she didn’t really love me, and everything wrong she ever did she claimed was to protect me, or for my own good, all kinds of that bull. And now, I’m- I’m free. She doesn’t hold anything over me, she can’t control me anymore. I don’t…. I don’t have to be just another member of the Luthor legacy anymore, y’know?”_

“I know,” Kara says, her voice soft, because she does know. She knows it like she knows Lena, deep and intimately because she loved her, maybe still does. It’s how she can tell Lena’s hurting now, even though she’s trying to force smiles, trying to explain everything away like it’s good.

“I- Lena, Barry’s house is hooked up to the Floo Network,” she adds. “I can- I have Floo powder, I can be over there if you need me to come.”

_“You don’t have to do that.”_

“It’s not any trouble, if you need-” Kara offers, but Lena cuts her off, and the smile on her face is a bittersweet kind of soft, the one she wears whenever she’s moments from crying.

_“Kara, don’t worry, I’ll be okay. Please don’t come all the way out here, it’s too far. Just- when we get back to school, can we talk?”  
_

”Of course, Lena,” Kara replies, and then, because she can’t help herself:

“I miss you.”

_“I miss you, too.”_

Something in Kara’s chest pings at that, and she sighs, soft enough that she’s confident her phone didn’t pick up the sound.

_“I’ll um- I’ll see you at school. Do you want to talk to Barry?”  
_

“Sure,” Kara answers, and as she goes to get him, she tries very hard not to think about the way her heartbeat is racing in her chest.

(“It was Lena, wasn’t it?” She asks from the doorway to her bedroom, and even though her voice is soft, it startles both Alex and Maggie. They look up at her with puzzled expressions, not having noticed her come in, and she continues.

“That you talked to the other night. It was Lena.”

Alex still looks confused, but Maggie’s face twists in understanding. “It was,” she confirms.

“Did Barry tell you what happened?”

“No, Lena did,” Kara replies. By now, Alex is glancing back and forth between them.

“Lena told who what?” She cuts in. “And when did you talk to Lena, and how?”

“Lena’s with Barry,” Kara answers, and even to her own ears, it sounds a little flat, a little hollow. “And I-”

She cuts herself off suddenly, when she realizes that she doesn’t even know how she feels about it. Without another word, she turns and walks out the door, thought unfinished, and both girls watch her go.)

-

Kara and Lena don’t talk again until they’re back at school.

She does have one quick conversation with Barry over text, agreeing to meet the other girl out in the courtyard the day after they get back, but that’s the rest of the communication they have until said meeting actually comes.

For once, Lena’s there first, and Kara clasps her hands together as she walks over. Lena takes a couple steps of her own forward, until they’re standing together by the fountain.

(It’s the closest they’ve been since they’ve broken up.)

For a moment, they stand in silence. A little bit of Kara thinks that this is somehow both energizing and heartbreaking. The former, because she has Lena close enough to reach out and touch, and the latter because she can’t lean forward and cup Lena’s cheek in her palm simply because she wants to.

“I don’t- I don’t really know how to start this,” Kara says finally, shuffling her feet a little and pushing her glasses further up on her face despite the fact that they’re weren’t falling in the first place, mostly for something to do with her hands. She feels unsure of herself rather suddenly, nervous. A little scared, too, but she’d rather not admit it.

“Me neither,” Lena murmurs, and she takes a cautious half-step forward. “But um, I- Kara, I am so sorry.”

Kara’s head snaps up. “You’re sorry?

It comes out incredulous. In a way, it’s almost like she wasn’t expecting Lena to apologize. She really shouldn’t be shocked at all, shouldn’t be surprised, and yet somehow, she is.

“I am so sorry,” Lena apologizes. “I let my mother come between us, I acted on what she wanted instead of what I did, like an idiot, and I ruined us because I was scared. She said- she said I had to end things between us, and if I didn’t, she would and- and it felt like a threat and I was so terrified that she would hurt you, and I thought that it was the only way to keep you safe, but I acted on what I thought was best and I kept you out of it, and I dragged you along for so long because I was too much of a coward to actually break up with you and I am so sorry-”

She cuts herself off as the tears start to fall, eyes fluttering shut, her lashes dark against her pale, washed out cheeks out. Kara’s thought, in this one millisecond of a moment, is that she looks just that bit slimmer, and she wonders if Lena’s been eating enough.

She steps forward, closing the distance between them because, no matter what, seeing pain drawn across Lena’s face like this cracks something in her chest. Reaching out, she cups Lena’s face in her hand like she’s done it a hundred times ( _and she has,_ a voice in her head whispers), thumb swiping at a tear.

“Lena, I-” she tries, but anything she could say here feels inadequate, feels wrong, so instead she does the best comfort she knows and offers a hug.

The response is a nod, small and barely there but it’s a nod, so Kara drops Lena’s cheek to pull the shorter girl into her chest, rubs circles over her back when she feels Lena press closer, grip the back of her robe like she’s holding on for dear life.

(Merlin, she seems so small, and Kara thinks that she’s afraid to ever let Lena go again.)

-

Lena fades back into their lives like it’s easy. Winn moves back into his own place and Lena slides into the spot between him and Kara, her fingers finding the other girl’s under the table as Winn nudges her with a smile.

Alex and Maggie both seem relieved, maybe even as much as Kara is. Everyone is glad to have her back with them. Somebody finally understands whatever inane thing Winn rants about on any given day again, is more than happy to let Barry beat her at Exploding Snap over and over again. It’s clear that in the past couple of months, she’s missed them all desperately, and is eager to spend time with them again.

For Kara and Lena, finding time to spend together alone is, at first, a challenge. Kara had filled most of the free space in her schedule with extra Quidditch practices, one-on-one sessions, and with the start of the second half of the school year, both she and Lena have more studying and more work for all the classes coming up.

Still, they manage. As the year goes on and her team grows into themselves, they need less individual work and more team practices, leaving more free space in her schedule for her friends and, of course, Lena.

It’s a little awkward at first. There’s a tension between them that Kara’s not familiar with, a sort of distance that they’ve never really had to deal with before in their relationship. 

A lot of it, Kara thinks, comes from the fact that neither of them know where they stand. Neither of them have a protocol, a guide to ‘getting-back-with-the-girl-who-broke-up-with-you-because-of-complicated-reasons’. Before, they were always touching, always huddled together, pressed shoulder to shoulder or holding hands. Now, every bit of contact comes with a touch of hesitancy, a pause before Lena will scoot a little closer, before Kara will grab her hand.

Kara’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a little bit frustrated. Maybe that’s what’s pushing her when, out of nowhere, she leans forward and wraps one hand around the back of Lena’s neck, cradling the girl’s cheek with her other, and kisses her.

(Lena melts against her with a sigh, and it feels like everything clicks back into place.)

-

(“What are you doing this summer? Kara asks, and Lena freezes.

“I, um- I’m not really sure yet,” Lena admits. “Barry said his parents are more than willing to take me in again, so I might do that.”

“You could come home with me,” the blonde suggests. “Maggie’s been staying with us every summer since she got kicked out, you could always just… come home with me this summer?”

“I’ve never met your mother,” Lena replies, eyes going a little wide. “And… and what if she doesn’t like me, I....”

“She’ll love you,” Kara assures her, reaching out to pull Lena close. “Anybody would be crazy not to love you, Lee, and she’ll love you because I do.”

Lena freezes, and it takes a moment for Kara to register what she’s just said.

“You love me?”

For a moment, she can’t speak. “Um, yeah,” she stammers, once her voice comes back. “I mean, of course I do, I… I, uh-”

Her face starts to turn bright red, but Lena only grins, leaning in to cut Kara off by kissing her. Kara blinks, a little thrown off, but she lets her hands fall to Lena’s waist anyway. When the other girl pulls back, Kara’s trying hard to catch her breath, and Lena’s looking at her like she hung the stars.

“I love you too,” she whispers. “In case you couldn’t tell.”

“So you’ll come home with me?” Kara asks. Lena only hesitates for a moment before nodding, and Kara feels a grin crack her face open before she smashes their lips together again.

_Thank Merlin,_ she thinks to herself, as Lena’s arms wind around her shoulder. _Thank. Merlin._ )

-

“You’re coming home with me,” Kara murmurs, a little reverent, as they board the train. Lena laughs as she tangles their hands together, following Alex and Maggie into one of the compartments. 

(All seven of them are trying to squeeze together into the same compartment like they did back in Kara’s first year. It’s a tight squeeze, Barry sitting on his trunk under the window, but they make it work.)

“I am,” Lena replies, and although she’s teasing, her voice comes out softer, in a tone that almost matches Kara’s. Lucy, who’s been a little quieter since this morning, still sticks her tongue out at the both of them.

“You two are gross,” she mocks, and Kara sticks her tongue out at her.

“Shut up, Lane,” Lena replies, and Lucy gives her a smirk but slides into her seat without another word. Kara and Lena make themselves comfortable in the seat across from them, making sure to leave enough room for Winn to slide in beside them.

When the train takes off and the station starts to disappear behind them, Alex gives a soft noise.

“I really graduated, didn’t I?” She murmurs.

“Yeah, Danvers,” Maggie replies, her voice just as quiet. “You really did.”

Across the carriage, Kara catches her sister’s eyes. _I’m proud of you_ , she mouths, and Alex grins a little in response, her eyes because suspiciously misty.

_I’m proud of you, too,_ Alex mouths back, and Kara beams, her grip around Lena’s middle tightening.

“Is everything okay?” Lena asks, her voice a whisper, tilting her head back to look at Kara.

“Everything is great,” Kara assures her. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Lena replies, smiling when Kara presses a kiss to her temple. Lucy doesn’t even tease them for it, and there’s a serene sort of silence over the compartment, Winn reading while Barry listens to music. Lucy stares out the window, and Maggie holds Alex’s hand as they lean against each other.

Kara looks around her at all these people she loves, the girl in her arms who loves her, and she thinks that she may never feel so at peace in her life again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wOw


	7. you know i love you so

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The greatest summer of Kara’s life, followed by what manages to be, in very different ways, both the best and worst year of Kara’s entire Hogwarts career.
> 
> or, I give Thea Queen an actual purpose and Barry Allen is in so many scenes he may as well be the one dating Kara

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am,,, so sorry,,,, because i know this was supposed to be the happy ending, and me being me, i had to add angst,,, but anyway, for those of you who’ve managed to make it through made of starlight and the rest of the series, thank you!!!!  
> this one is also long because i kept getting carried away

Having Lena for the summer is just as exciting as Kara thought it would be.

The first week and a half, Barry, Winn, and Lucy all stay with them, and James comes down as a surprise. Fitting eight teenagers into the house is it’s own sort of challenge, as well as feeding them, but they make it work. Kara and Lena manage to share a twin bed, as do Alex and Maggie. They scrounge up an air mattress, too, and the remaining four bicker over who gets to use it. In the end, Barry and Winn stake a claim to it for the first half of the trip, and agree to let Lucy and James have it the second.

(Kara understands that she has a tendency to be gross and sappy, but there’s something to be said about waking up with Lena tucked against her every morning, even in a tiny, cramped twin bed.)

Kara drags Lena and their friends around Midvale, eager to show them the sights. It’s particularly exciting for Lena and Barry, who have little exposure to muggle towns and culture. She and Alex show them fun, non-magical things to do, like bowling and mini-golf, both of which Alex beats her sister, and most of their friends at. Lucy, however, does manage a higher score than Alex at bowling, something she is endlessly smug about. 

One of the funniest moments is when they run into Rick Malverne in an arcade. For the several years of their life before Hogwarts, Kara and Alex when to primary school with the muggle kids. Since starting Hogwarts, they don’t really spend much time with the kids into town, but they still run into some they recognize, or ones that recognize them. Cue: Rick. A little different, because he lives only a block or two away, but still not someone they’re all that close to.

He runs into Kara, Winn, and Alex by the ske-ball machines. James, Maggie, and Lucy are off trying to knock down clowns with balls, while Barry and Lena are trying out racing games at the former’s insistence. Winn, Kara, and Alex are all trying to see who can get the highest scor when Rick’s voice catches their attention.

“Alex and mini Alex!” He greets. Kara blinks, mostly at being referred to ‘mini Alex’ by someone she doesn’t instantly recognize, especially now that she’s taller than her sister.

After a moment, Alex seems to pick up on who he is, plastering a small smile on her face that Kara can obviously tell is forced.

“Rick,” she says, far less enthusiastic than he seems. “Nice to see you, too.”

“I’m good, just hanging out,” he replies. “Didn’t realize you guys were back around yet, from that fancy boarding school you go to, or whatever. What’s it called again?”

Alex brushes the question off with a wave of her hand. “Yeah, we got out for the summer,” she answers.

“Ha, I could tell,” Rick says, taking a half step closer to Alex. “When are you going to come back to regular school with the rest of us, Lexie?”

Alex bristles at the nickname, one she’s detested even since the kids in primary school called her by it. “I’m not,” she deadpans. “I graduated.”

“Oh,” he replies. “You moving home full time, then? Gonna slum it back here with us in Midvale?”

“No,” she answers, face losing her fake smile. “I’m moving away-”

“Aw, but we never see you around,” Rick complains. “And with a face like yours, I’d love to see you ‘round home way more often, yeah?”

Winn recoils a little from his words, and Kara winces, sure that this conversation is going to end with Alex’s fist in Rick’s face, but she (and Alex) are saved when Maggie comes striding over, closely followed by Lucy and James, almost as if they were flanking her. A little behind them are Barry and Lena, who’ve realized something is happening and are making their way over. Alex glances over, and deflates a little in something like relief.

“He bothering you, babe?” Maggie asks, cutting right through the conversation. Alex’s eyes go a little wide, before her face slips into something more playful.

“Not with you around,” she replies.

“Smooth talker,” the other girl says, sounding almost pleasantly surprised as she rests her hand on Alex’s lower back before turning to Rick. “Anyway, is there something we can help you with?”

Rick blinks a couple times, sputters a goodbye, and leaves as fast as he can. Alex relaxes a little once he’s left them alone, and Maggie turns to her wide eyes.

“Sorry, he was flirting with you, I got kind of annoyed,” she apologizes, once Rick’s far out of hearing range.

“Oh, don’t be, that was hot,” Alex assures her, leaning down to press their lips together, and Kara makes a disgusted noise before grabbing Lena’s hand and dragging her away.

(She will admit, though, that look on Rick’s face when they pass him on their way out is hilarious.)

-

(The rest of their summer is just as amazing. Over the course of three months, Kara manages to drag everyone to a fair one town over, the batting cages down by the park, the lake nearby, and any other place she can think of.

And, when Lena goes to visit the Allens, Kara manages to convince Eliza it’s finally time to let her get a cat, a gray and white tabby who, as it turns out, adores Lena just as much as Kara does.)

-

The scariest thing about her seventh year, Kara thinks, is that Alex won’t be there.

She won’t lie, the idea makes her nervous. It’s not that she and Alex are codependent, as much as James liked to insist they were, teasingly. It’s just that she’s always had Alex with her, and now, she’s a little scared.

Both Alex and Maggie drop her and Lena off at the train station. For a moment, they all stand there, staring at each other, before Kara lunges forward into Alex, pulling her into a tight hug. Her sister huffs as the air rushes from her lunges, but her arms come up around Kara’s back anyway.

“You’re going to be fine,” she murmurs.

“I didn’t say I wasn’t,” Kara replies, a little petulantly, but it loses some weight considered she’s doing her best to press her face into the other girl’s shoulder.

“You didn’t say it, but you were thinking it,” Alex fires back. “You always think way too loud.”

“Jerk.”

“Brat.”

When Alex laughs, Kara does, too, squeezing her sister just that little bit tighter. She knows, of course, that it’s a sort of childish, but Alex has been her safe space for so long, after her house burned to the ground and left her an orphan before she’d even turned seven years old. The idea of not having Alex within walking distance at all times anymore is it’s own sort of scary.

Her eyes feel warm and she realizes, despite herself, that she’s about to cry. When she glances over, she can see Maggie swiping a tear from Lena’s cheek, and somehow, that only makes her want to cry _more_.

“Our table’s going to feel so empty without you guys,” Kara says. “Who’s going to make fun of us now?”

Alex snorts. “Barry will,” she points out. “And I’m sure if you asked really nicely, Leslie Willis would be happy to join in.”

“No way,” Kara scoffs, but it lacks the bite it used to when talking about Leslie. The Slytherin had managed to grow on Lena, and by extension, Kara herself. She doesn’t really understand it, but over the years, she’s grown to mind the girl less and less.

Pulling away, Alex reaches out to cup Kara’s face in her palms. “I am so proud of you,” she says. “You are my best friend, and even if you can be stubborn and annoying, you are also bright and amazing and one of the best people I know. You’re going to kill it your final year, yeah?”

Kara chokes up, tears falling a little easier, a little more freely, and she nods, hands coming up to clutch Alex’s elbow. “I love you,” she whispers, voice cracking.

“I love you, too,” Alex echoes. “Go be awesome.”

Alex lets her go with a gentle smile, before turning to Lena and wrapping her into another hug. In return, Maggie comes over to pull Kara into one of her own, despite the face that Kara has several inches on the other girl.

“Make sure the two of you take care of each other, okay?”

“I will,” Kara agrees, and Maggie claps her once on the shoulder before stepping back. Beside them, Alex is just pulling away from a now red-eyed Lena, and Kara steps closer to take her girlfriend’s hand, squeezing softly.

“You two be good,” Alex says.

“We will,” Kara promises, as the train whistle blows behind them. She glances at it over her shoulder for a moment.

“We have to go,” Lena murmurs, sounding as if it’s the last thing she wants to do.

Alex and Maggie nod, and Kara swallows hard as they turn away, heading for the train. Lena wipes at her eyes as they board, and when Kara shoots one last look at them, Maggie is leaned up on her tiptoes and holding Alex, but she gives Kara one last smile when she sees her.

After getting on the Hogwarts Express, Kara tugs Lena behind her into a compartment. Once they’re inside a compartment, Kara pulls her hand from Lena’s and brushing the tears from her cheeks. She leans down to kiss her, soft, but Lena pushes back up against her, curling a hand around the back of her neck and pushing Kara into the seat, straddling her.

“Barry and Winn will be here soon,” Kara mumbles, a half-hearted protest when her hand starts to slip under Lena’s robes to grip her waist. “And literally anybody who walks by can see us right now.”

“We’re in the back of the train,” Lena says, lips on the Kara’s jaw. “Just… kiss me, please?”

(She does, but it should be noted that it was Lena’s idea, and therefore, she can’t be held responsible when Winn walks on in on them, exactly like she said he would.

It’s worth it, though, because Lena’s eye’s look a lot less red when she pulls away, and there’s little Kara wouldn’t do to make Lena feel better.)

-

The first time somebody brings up the Yule Ball to Kara, it’s Patty Spivot and they’re sat at the Hufflepuff table watching the new first-years get sorted. A couple of the Hufflepuff team members are sat together, including Kara, Barry, and Patty, talking among themselves and cheering for the first years that get sorted into their house.

“You know, the Yule Ball is coming up this year,” Patty says, grinning. “Are you guys excited?”

Kara tilts her head. “It is,” she replies. “It slipped my mind, I guess.”

“Mine too,” Barry chimes in. “When do the students from Durmstrang and Beauxbatons arrive?”

Patty shrugs. “A couple weeks, I guess?” She answers. “Are you guys going to attend the ball?”

Kara hums. “Probably. It means I’d miss Christmas with Alex and Eliza and Maggie, though.”

“Well, you better stay, because I am,” Barry teases, knocking their shoulders together. “Who else is going to be my date to the Ball if you aren’t going?”

Kara scoffs, and he laughs. “I’m kidding,” he adds. “I know you and Lena are going to go together and be the disgustingly adorable couple you are.”

“Well, I technically have to ask her still, but probably,” Kara agrees. “But you can always take Winn with you, or, you know, you could ask a pretty girl to go with you?”

Barry sputters, and from across the table, Patty lips curl up in an overly sweet smile. “Oh, I’ll go with you Barry,” she offers.

“You will?”

“Yeah, on one condition.”

“What?”

Patty’s grin turns from sweet to smug. “Pigs learn to grow wings and fly,” she mocks.

Barry huffs, crossing his arms even as both girls clap and cheer for one of the first-years. “You know, we’re at a wizarding school,” he mutters, once they sit down. “I could actually make a pig fly.”

“I said _learn_ ,” Patty points out. “Completely different.”

Barry rolls his eyes, and Patty yelps when he kicks her shin under the table.

“Behave,” Kara says, shoving him on Patty’s behalf.

“You’re all buzzkills,” he grumbles.

(Another round of applause goes up in the Great Hall as one more kid is sorted, this time into Slytherin. A little on reflex, Kara glances over to where she knows Lena’s sitting. The brunette is clapping with a grin, and when she looks over to see Kara watching her, her lips curl even further, and she gives a little wave. Kara laughs, eyes tilting up at the corners.

“Stop making googly-eyes at your girlfriend already,” Barry interjects, elbowing her.

“Shut _up_ , Barry.”)

-

(The first breakfast of the year, Kara pauses eating to look up at all her friends, gathered around the table. “You know what?”

“What?” Barry asks.

“This year is going to be great,” she declares, and shoves another spoonful of cereal into her mouth with a smile.)

-

(Her I-can-feel-it’s-going-to-be-great seventh year cracks a little more than a few weeks into the year.)

Kara, for someone who’s seventeen, has gotten a fair amount of bad news.

The worst, of course, was from the firemen, when they pulled her mother and father’s limp bodies from the charred wreckage of her house and told her that they were very sorry, but her parents were gone. Up until the day she passes, she’ll remember the way her chest seemed to burn with the ruins of her family home.

Second to that was the day that Eliza sat her and Alex down on the couch and told her that Jeremiah had died on his latest mission. A dark wizard had struck him square in the chest with a killing curse, and Alex had run off into the backyard and screamed into the forest until her voice gave out and she collapsed into Eliza’s arms.

As a seventeen year old, she gets what (at the time) is the third worst piece of news she’s ever received, and it starts when Thea Queen misses their Ancient Runes class.

(Ancient Runes for seventh years is a small class, all four houses in the same period and they still don’t manage to fill a classroom all the year. It makes it really obvious to notice Thea’s absence.)

The next morning, she’s sat down at breakfast when the youngest Queen finds her. Thea looks worse for the wear, her face a washed out pale and her robes wrinkled. Quietly, she pulls Kara away from the table and out of the Great Hall, leaving several people staring after them.

“Thea?” Kara asks, once they’re out of everyone’s sight. “Is everything alright?”

“Kara, I-” Thea says, but she cuts herself off, coughing a couple of times to clear her throat before continuing. “Something’s happened, I- I thought you should know before it started to spread around the school.”

“Um, okay,” she replies, but she can feel anxiety starting to rise into her throat like bile, almost gagging her.

“Tommy died late on Tuesday night.”

She freezes, and there’s a bitter, fleeting moment of nothingness before denial crashes over her in a wave.

“There’s- no,” she replies. “Tommy’s… he’s dead? I- _how?”_

“He was on a mission,” Thea answers. “He and a couple other Aurors were trying to bust a house filled with suspected dark wizards. It- it was a trap, and one of the wizards pulled the roof down. The other Aurors got out, but Tommy…”

“Oh,” Kara whispers, voice breaking as the tears spring to her eyes. “I- oh no, Tommy-”

Her back hits the wall, hand covering her own mouth because she feels like she wants to shout. Somehow, she has lost four people that shaped her before she’s even made it into adulthood, and right now, she feels all the losses in her chest like a blade because _Tommy’s dead, how can Tommy be dead?  
_

And even though she barely knows Thea Queen, couldn’t tell you her favorite color or her favorite food or anything about her, the other girl pulls her into a hug. Kara returns it on instinct, moving before she even has a chance to think about it.

She may not know Thea, but in the moment, they are two, grieving girls holding onto each other.

-

(The news about Tommy’s death breaks before the next meal, and Kara skips all her classes that day.

Barry finds her around lunch, curled up on the couch and staring at the fire with a blank expression. Wordlessly, he throws everything he’s carrying down and sits down next to her, taking a little bit of the blanket he offers and slips under it, the two of the huddled together with the fabric draped over both of their shoulders.

“He’s dead,” Barry says and the empty tone of his face matches how Kara feels.

“Yeah,” she murmurs, and that’s the last thing they say for the rest of the afternoon.)

-

(Kara doesn’t question it when a small girl in too-big robes finds her after dinner that evening and tells her there’s someone looking for her outside the entrance to the Hufflepuff dorms. By now, Tommy’s death has probably been spread across the whole school, and Kara knows without a doubt that the ‘someone’ outside is Lena.

Sure enough, when she emerges into the hallway, she finds her girlfriend standing there with her hands shoved into her pockets. When Lena sees her, she jumps forward, closing the distance between them. She must be able to see just how awful Kara feels from the look in her eyes, because she makes a sad sort of humming noise.

“Are you okay?”

“Not- not really,” Kara replies honestly. “I- no.”

“Is there anything I can do?” Lena asks.

Kara stumbles, unsure of an answer. “I don’t know,” she admits after a moment, shoulders slumped.

“Do you just want me to hug you?”

She nods, and Lena steps forward to pull Kara into her arms, standing on her tiptoes to cradle the blonde’s head in one hand and rub circles on her back with the other.

“I am so sorry, darling,” Lena murmurs. Kara sniffs, determined not to cry again, and presses her nose into the crook of Lena’s neck. “I know it hurts, I’m so sorry.”

“He was just- he was Tommy,” Kara whispers. “He was Tommy, and he taught me so much and now he’s just gone, you know? And it _hurts_.”

“I know, I know,” Lena hums. “And it’s going to hurt for a while, but it’ll get better, okay?”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

Kara pulls Lena a little closer, holds her a little tighter, and lets herself believe it.)

-

(Lena is, as usual, right. It takes time to heal, time to move on, but eventually, Kara starts to smile easier, makes it through days, and then weeks, without crying. 

She heals. She always does.)

-

Lena asks Kara to the Yule Ball, as if they weren’t already going together, and even though they originally agreed to go shopping together, Kara convinces Lena that they should do it separately, That’s how poor Winn and Barry get roped in to shopping, allowing themselves to be dragged to (different) dress stores.

It’s an automatic, unspoken sort of agreement that Lena’s going with Winn and Kara’s going with Barry. Considering whatever is going on with Winn, Lena is more than happy to spend time with him. Kara takes Barry, of course, because ever since she’s started to dating Lena, he’s been her best friend.

She makes Barry watch her try on a few dresses, before they both agree on one, a yellow number that falls just above her knee. Together, they deem it their favorite, and Kara buys it while Barry puts the rest back.before they head to the Three Broomsticks and get a couple butterbeers, two for themselves and two for Lena and Winn. Their plan is to meet up after dress shopping, so that they can all go together to find matching robes for Barry and Winn.

(They could have gone separately, of course, but it was a mutual agreement between the four of them that, without Kara and Lena there to give them advice, they’d be a hopeless sort of lost.)

It takes a little while, but Lena and Winn show up eventually, both of them chatting animatedly, excitement on their faces. They slip into the booth with Kara and Barry and rope them both in on their conversation about the newest broomstick on the market. Lena and Winn are both interested from the tech aspect, of course, but Kara and Barry are Quidditch players, after all, and they find themselves involved in a debate about whether or not the outrageous price increase makes it worth it.

“Of course it does!” Barry says. “Maybe not when you’re playing Quidditch on a school level, but on a professional team, it’s completely worth it. If you’re trying to be the best, you better have the best, because you put yourself at a disadvantage otherwise.”

“But isn’t Quidditch a game of skill?” Winn argues. “Anyone can fly the newest model around, but it takes someone with the talent to use it well, and that matters far more than the broom.”

“But it’s _professional_ Quidditch, Winn,” Kara points out. “Everyone playing has talent, they’ve been playing for years. You’ve got to do everything you can to put yourself ahead!”

After a few more minutes of heated debate, Winn concedes, knowing he’s lost. It doesn’t help that Lena’s long since given up trying to help defend his point, but when he calls her out, she grins at him.

“I know a lost cause when I see one,” she teases, and Kara snorts, nearly choking on her butterbeer. Winn pouts, and Lena gives him her most angelic look, leaning a little further into Kara’s side.

“You’re an ass,” he whines.

“Yeah, well this _ass_ is your best friend,” she replies, and he rolls his eyes.

“Whatever,” Winn scoffs, but he smiles over the rim of his mug. “You’re lucky you are.”

“Yes, I am,” Lena agrees, and as the two of them share a look, Kara reaches out to kick Barry in the shin.

“Isn’t this nice?” She jokes. “The power of friendship!”

“You tease, but you love us anyway,” Winn fires back.

Kara wants to protest, but anything she can think to say back dies in her throat, because yeah, she does love her friends, so much that it hurts sometimes.

Instead, she smiles, reaching over Lena to shove at Winn’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I do,” she agrees.

-

(The holiday break comes up on her and catches Kara completely off-guard. When the younger students pack up on the train to go home and classes stop, she finds herself surprised. She’s the only one, of course, when all her other friends have been counting down the days.

She spends the break goofing off with her friends, stealing Lena away into empty hallways, and playing pickup games of Quidditch with a bunch of other players from other houses. The ball has everyone in high spirits, people laughing all the time, chasing each other around the hallways, playing games and throwing parties in the common rooms. Kara and Barry manage to slip Lena and Winn into the Hufflepuff common room for a Christmas Eve party, largely due to how lax the staff has been on enforcing rules.

Together, they all exchange gifts, before Kara and Lena manage to sneak off when Winn and Barry get caught up in playing some muggle game with coins. Lena laughs when her back hits the mattress of Kara’s bed, which is promptly followed by the blonde flopping down next to her, wrapping her arms around Lena and curling against her.

“This is nice,” Kara murmurs. “I miss sleeping with you.”

“You miss what now?” Lena replies, one eyebrow raised, and Kara huffs.“You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, I do,” the brunette whispers. “I miss it, too.”

“Are you sure you can’t stay here tonight?” Kara asks.

“I could try, but they’re probably going to be doing headcounts in the dorms tonight,” Lena says. “Just because they’re being more relaxed about the rules doesn’t mean they can allow ‘fraternization’. Even though it’s Christmas break, they’ve still got about a third of the students still here, maybe more. It’s a lot different than the past couple years.”

“Hmm,” Kara hums, pressing herself closer into Lena’s side. “I wanna stay like this forever.”  
Lena grins up at the ceiling, threading her fingers through Kara’s hair. “Me too.”)

-

Lena slips out eventually to make it back to the Slytherin dungeon before her curfew, Kara pouting the entire time. Eventually, though, she slips under the covers and falls asleep, if only due to the fact that her roommate Felicity keeps throwing clothes at her across the room every time she shifts too much and makes noise.

She spends Christmas morning in the courtyard with her friends, chasing each other around and playing games, before it’s time to head back to their dorms to get ready. Barry ends up getting roped into getting ready with Kara, Felicity, and Patty.

“Please, Barry, let me do your eyebrows,” Felicity all but begs. “They’ll look so good, I promise.”

“Keep those brushes away from my face, thank you,” he replies. “I’m sure you’re very good with the whole make-up thing, but I am okay without it, believe me.”

Felicity rolls her eyes, but grins anyway. “Whatever, Barry,” she says. “Come here, Kara, let me do yours instead.”

Kara laughs as Felicity pulls the blonde down next to her on the bed, but only smiles instead of protesting as her roommate starts to rifle through her make-up bag.

(“So, Patty,” Barry pipes up, while Felicity’s busy doing Kara’s make-up, a teasing lilt to his voice. “Remind me again why you couldn’t go with your poor friend Barry Allen to the Yule Ball?”

“I have a date,” she answers.

“Who’s the lucky guy, then?” He asks.

“Um, Patty is _my_ date, excuse you,” Felicity says. From where she’s lounging on Kara’s bed, hands tucked under her head, Patty turns to shoot him an almost wolfish grin. Barry blinks, and falls silent.)

After a good long while, Felicity tosses her make-up back into her bag and passes Kara a mirror, eyebrows raised as she waits for the reaction. Kara lifts it to her face, glancing at her reflection a couple times before her lips start to curl up. When Felicity notices her smile, she beams, eyes lighting up.

“Good?” She asks.

“Great,” Kara corrects, tossing some of her hair over her shoulder. “Thank you so much, Felicity, I love it.”

“You flatter me, Danvers,” Felicity protests. “Now that you’re all dolled up, are you ready to go find your girl?”

“She’s been ready since she walked in this room,” Barry butts in, and Kara throws her pillow at his face to hear him sputter.

“Let’s go,” she says, ignoring what he said completely as she jumps up to her feet, grabbing Barry by the elbow and pulling him after her as they leave, Patty and Felicity trailing behind them.

The girls disappear on them somewhere before they reach the outside of the Great Hall. Barry offers her his arm to make it down the stairs, and she takes it gratefully, largely due to the fact that she’s wearing heels an inch taller than she’s used to.

She spots Lena once she reaches the bottom, standing beside Winn in his fancy dress robes. Barry nudges her in the side, and she pushes him away as she picks up her pace to try and make it to Lena before her girlfriend notices her making her way over.

“Lena,” she calls, once she’s close enough to be heard. At the sound of her name, the brunette turns, and Kara takes delight in the way her jaw drops the slightest bit.

(Of course, Winn will tell her tomorrow morning that she looked just as starry-eyed, grinning like a fool, and even if she protests, she knows he’s right.)

“You look beautiful,” Lena whispers, earning herself a laugh.

“So do you,” Kara assures her, and Lena reaches out to kiss her. For a moment, Kara obliges her, before remembering that they are both wearing very different, very obvious shades of lipstick. When she pulls away to remind her girlfriend of that, however, Lena huffs in something like disappointment. They’re both distracted when the doors behind them creak open, and together, they walk into the Great Hall.

Inside, they lose both the boys with minutes, Winn to a sixth year girl they don’t know, and Barry to Leslie Willis, of all people. Still grinning, Kara pulls Lena over to the dance floor 

“Why do you get to lead?” Lena asks, when Kara places a hand on her waist.

“I’m taller than you,” Kara replies, smiling. Lena scoffs, but she tosses her arm over the blonde’s shoulder anyway.

“You can be annoying sometimes, you know that, right?”

“Oh, yes, you’ve made me well aware of this before,” Kara points out. “But I hope you know you’re going to be stuck with me being annoying for a good, long while, yeah?”

Lena beams, openly and honestly and loving. Above them, the lights flicker like stars, and snow floats down around them, evaporating the moment it comes into contact with anything 

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

(Kara wants to remember this forever.)

\- 

(The next morning, Kara wakes up on her bed, still wearing her dress and tangled in the blankets. There’s red on her neck and her lips and she runs to the bathroom to wipe it off before Felicity sees it.

Still, as she takes a third makeup wipe to her skin, she smiles anyway.)

-

About a month after the Yule Ball, Lena starts to act really secretive about something.  
Kara doesn’t know what it is, because her girlfriend refuses to tell her, but suddenly Lena starts to receive letters with no return address, and Lena’s name written in sloppy handwriting that Kara feels like she should recognize.

She’s not worried, because whenever she tries to weasel any answers out of Lena, the brunette just smiles and fakes innocence, despite the fact that she’s all but vibrating with excitement.

“Please, will you just tell me?” Kara all but begs. _“Please?”_

“Tell you what?” Lena replies. “There’s nothing to tell.”

It goes on like this for days, weeks, until their next trip out of the castle. The closer and closer they get to the upcoming Hogsmeade, the more amped up Lena seems to get. The longer it goes on, the more Kara wants to know, until she feels like she’s going to burst with anticipation.

She corners Lena in the hallway a couple of days before the trip, catching her off guard in hopes of getting her to let something slip. “I know you’re planning something,” she accuses.

“Okay, so maybe I am planning something,” Lena admits, but the smile on her face is sly. “But that doesn’t change the fact that you have no idea what is, and that I’m not going to tell you.”

Kara huffs. “Le- _na_ ,” she whines, and the brunette leans up on her toes to kiss Kara once before striding away, tossing one last grin over her shoulder.

They don’t talk about it again until the day of the Hogsmeade trip. Lena is smiling from ear-to-ear at breakfast that morning, and she rushes Kara to hurry up and eat so they can head out. She’s never seen Lena so excited before, and she’ll admit, it’s incredibly contagious, and she finds herself stuffing a bunch of eggs and allowing herself to be dragged out of the castle and into town.

There’s a little bit of snow falling when they make it to the village, and Lena heads straight for Three Broomsticks. They come to a stop right outside the door, and Kara rubs her mitten-covered hands together. “Will you please _finally_ tell me what’s going on?”

Lena glances over Kara’s shoulder, and her eyes light up. “Well…”

“Surprise.”

Kara spins on her heels and there’s Alex and Maggie standing in front of her, identical grins on their faces. Kara lets out something akin to a shriek as she throws herself at her sister, who snorts as Kara crashes into her.

“You’re here,” Kara whispers.

“Well, if you couldn’t come home for Christmas, we figured we’d come to you,” Alex tells her, arms coming up to circle the younger girl’s back, squeezing tight. “After all, we did miss you.”

“I missed you, too,” Kara replies, pulling back and smiling, hands on Alex’s shoulders. “I never wanna go so long without getting to see you ever again, okay?”

Alex tips her head and laughs, warm and familiar, and even though they’re standing in the middle of the snow outside a pub, it feels like home.

(They spend the whole day together, laughing and teasing each other as they run around the village, and Kara decides that this has been the absolute best surprise ever.)

-

(The year speeds up after that. Exam prep hits Kara like a truck, and instead of spending all their free time together cuddling and napping, Lena actually makes Kara study,

Her team pushes on, eager to qualify for the Quidditch cup, and there’s cheering aplenty when they do, beating out Ravenclaw to get slotted against Slytherin for the final match, as has been tradition the past couple of years.

Suddenly, the end of the year is here, and even though Kara’s not sure she’s ready for it, she’s damn well sure she can try to be.)

-

(They win the Quidditch cup, same as they did in her fifth year, Tommy’s last as captain and at school.

A storm has already started above them, clouds opening up and pouring down onto the pitch. When they give it to her, she stares at it for a moment before wrapping one hand around the base and lifting it up, her tears mixing with the rainwater as her team cheers around her.

Across from her, Barry is looking at her with the same expression she’s sure she’s wearing, his own eyes starting to look a little red, and she knows they’re both thinking the same thing.

“For Tommy,” she says, and she places her free hand between them, palm facing Barry. He reaches out with his own to meet it, and she locks their fingers together.

“For Tommy,” he echoes, and pulls her into a hug, trapping their clasped hands between their bodies. He wraps his free arm around her back and she tosses hers over his shoulder, still holding the Quidditch cup.

The rain pours down around them, and they both cry.)

-

Kara asks Lena to move into an apartment with her.

From a logical and a financial standpoint, it’s the right thing to do. Both of them are sitting atop substantial amounts of money, pieces of their parents and grandparent’s estates that, in one way or another, have been theirs for years. Even without jobs, they could be set for decades on what they already have.

But it’s about more than that. Kara knows now, with certainty, that she loves Lena. With her whole being, every little piece of her. Lena is what she wants to wake up to, wants to fall asleep to. She wants to spend lazy Sundays curled up together with each other and their cat, napping and talking and just holding each other. She wants to have their friends over on Fridays, to cook dinner together on Tuesdays, to play music and dance in the living room on Saturdays.

She wants a future.

(And Lena does too, because she says yes the second Kara asks her, smiling like she can’t help herself.)

When they get on the Hogwarts Express for what’s the last time, she thinks she understands the quiet silence that Lucy, Alex, and Maggie fell into. She feels it now, stretching through their compartment. Winn glances out the window, wistful, like he’s trying to soak up every last glance of the Hogsmeade he can. Beside him, Barry is very much the same, turning his wand over and over in his hands. Lena’s eyes look wet, and even though she hasn’t started crying yet, she likely will.

Kara hums, pressing her nose into the crown of Lena’s head, and hums, taking her own look out the window as the train starts to move. Slowly, the Hogsmeade station turns into trees and countryside as they take off.

“We’re leaving,” Lena says, softly.

“Yeah,” Kara whispers back.

“Do you think everything we did was worth it?” Winn asks. “Like, do you think we used all our time well? Do you think we could’ve done more, learned more? Did we make it worth it?”

Kara thinks back. There were classes she didn’t take, exams she didn’t do well on. She thinks about her awkward, failed relationship with James, about Mike cheating on her. Her break-up with Lena and the horrible, long period that followed afterward of having to cope with the loss of not only her girlfriend, but her best friend.

But then there’s everything else. How happy Alex was for her when she was sorted into Hufflepuff. The first time she met Barry and Winn. The first time she really ever talked to Lena, the two of them laughing together in the library. Learning to ride her broomstick, making it onto the Quidditch team. Tommy teaching her how to play keeper, how to be captain. Both times she won the Quidditch cup.

Getting to fall in love with Lena not once, but twice.

Kara turns to Winn, and she smiles.

“Yeah,” she says. “It was all worth it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, we made it to the end!!! awesome, yeah? but WAIT, there’s MORE. make sure you’re watching, because this friday, i’m going to release a nice, big stand-alone epilogue ft. our loving gays living together, more maggie & lena scenes, and maybe even some of the superfriends having kids!!!!!! stay tuned, y’all!!

**Author's Note:**

> follow me at i-am-not-carrot.tumblr.com and find all starlight series content at i-am-not-carrot.tumblr.com/tagged/starlight
> 
> thank you for reading, and sticking around for a sequel!!!! i love you all!!!! leave me a comment and tell me which scene is your favorite!!! personally, mine isn't until chapter seven!!


End file.
